Terrelle Pryor. Duh.
In the future, they're just going to start giving the Heisman directly to the top incoming freshman every year. Rivals and Scout will alternate years as final arbiter, and the statue will be redesigned to feature, Janus-like, Jamie Newberg's face on one side of its visage and Mel Kiper's on the other. It'll be carrying a laptop, not a football, and instead of a helmet, the statue will wear a tiny baseball cap. The trophy winner will be able to change its little cap repeatedly like a Barbie outfit during his National Signing Day announcement at the Downtown Athletic Club.
At least I hope that's what happens. We really need to get all of this inefficient business of football games out of the way, don't we?