25 Signs You Have Grown Up

#1

hohenfelsvol

How uwe doo-in?!?
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#1
25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP
1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next
door won't turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You take naps.
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."
23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking "Oh crap, what happened?"
Bonus:
26. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass.
 
#3
#3
one change for me...
24. You drink at home to save money INSTEAD of going to a bar...

other than that, every last one is dead on.
 
#4
#4
one change for me...
24. You drink at home to save money INSTEAD of going to a bar...

other than that, every last one is dead on.

That depends on if the game is on PPV. Such as Air Force. $20 to get game plus buying the beer. Find a good bar and you'll come out about even.
 
#5
#5
That depends on if the game is on PPV. Such as Air Force. $20 to get game plus buying the beer. Find a good bar and you'll come out about even.
good point. though i can still run up a $100 bar tab in a couple of hours...so it may not work too well for me....:mf_surrender:
 
#6
#6
Good list but I doubt that this applies to anybody here at the Nation

23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
 
#9
#9
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."


Ah so very true
 
#10
#10
good point. though i can still run up a $100 bar tab in a couple of hours...so it may not work too well for me....:mf_surrender:

I kow what you mean. :toast:

My family has habit of doing shots for every score. Last year was a sober and cheap year. I am hoping to break that trend this year.
 
#11
#11
I kow what you mean. :toast:

My family has habit of doing shots for every score. Last year was a sober and cheap year. I am hoping to break that trend this year.
here's to hoping you and your family is sloppy drunk from September to early January....:toast:
 
#12
#12
Sadly, this is a dead on balls accurate list.

BTW...I have to call the cops on MY OWN KID to get him to turn his stereo down. He's about 3 inches taller than me, outweighs me by 40 pounds, and is 40 years younger than me.
 
#13
#13
Sadly, this is a dead on balls accurate list.

BTW...I have to call the cops on MY OWN KID to get him to turn his stereo down. He's about 3 inches taller than me, outweighs me by 40 pounds, and is 40 years younger than me.

Too bad he moved next door when he moved out and started supporting himself. It is difficult to control the kid when he controls his own checkbook. :whistling:
 

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