Am I in the wrong…

#3
#3
She is a grown adult and can do as she wishes.


Ok, enough with that.

Reality time.

Tell her she is an adult and can do as she wishes-however, you foresee sudden financial hardship for the next 4 years or so and probably will not be able to help her out.


She will be a Vol really quick lol
 
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#4
#4
I mean maybe if she’s doing so out of spite.

But if Alabama is the school she wants to go to and has legitimate reasons for it, then I think it’s important to support her. I went to UT because I wanted to peruse Anthropology and their program is phenomenal. My father had nothing to do with that decision and never pushed me to go to any school except whichever one was best for me. It happened to be UT and her certainly was quite happy with that.
 
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#5
#5
In this situation you need to threaten to “withhold” from her mother and let her mother do the convincing. Best of luck, my brother!

Go VOLS!
 
#7
#7
allvol123 said:
This is a blue font question, right?
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So the thing is, she is graduating next year, and she is receiving lots of unsolicited mail from colleges everywhere. One came from Alabama. I asked her if she had requested that information, and she said that she was thinking about going there. She said that with a straight face. So my knee jerk reaction was as the thread title suggests. I sort of feel bad about it, but I also sort of don’t.
 
#10
#10
Fightmaker said:
I sort of feel bad about it, but I also sort of don’t.
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The "sort of feel bad about it" is the angel on your right shoulder speaking. The "sort of don't" is the devil on your left. Your relationship with your wife and step-daughter is incalculably more important than your step-daughter's potential future rooting interest.
 
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#12
#12
Fightmaker said:
For threatening to never speak to my step daughter again if she goes to Alabama?
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My best friends daughter listed off a bunch of schools she want to apply to. Bama was one of them, along with Ole Miss, Auburn, USF, & several others.Me & her father both told her that if she goes to Bama, do not come back.
 
#13
#13
I tell my kids that they should always be a Tennessee fans. If they enroll in another college and attend a football game, they should wear a Vols shirt under their current-school shirt, because "you always dance with who brung you."
 
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#14
#14
butchna said:
Disowning a family member over fandom is an Alabama move.
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It would seem that way when looking at this situation in a vacuum, but she also roots for Michigan, and says that she hopes Michigan gets to beat Tennessee in football. She was born and raised here. I think I speak for all of us when I say that we are all better off without this kid.
 
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#17
#17
Fightmaker said:
It would seem that way when looking at this situation in a vacuum, but she also roots for Michigan, and says that she hopes Michigan gets to beat Tennessee in football. She was born and raised here. I think I speak for all of us when I say that we are all better off without this kid.
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You doing schtick…or should I be calling the police?
 
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#18
#18
butchna said:
You doing schtick…or should I be calling the police?
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In all honesty, this entire saga was meant to be lighthearted, from my conversation with her, to this thread. Her mother took my comments as lighthearted. But the kid isn’t sure. So while I’ll obviously continue to love her and be cordial with her, I want her to always have it in the back of her mind that things could easily get unpleasant in a hurry if she goes to Bama.
 
#19
#19
I told my daughter that I would not be providing any assistance if she went to georgia, Vandy or Gump U. Anywhere else south of the Ohio River was up for legitimate discussion
 
#20
#20
You should take her down there on October 21st.

Make sure you sit in the Orange section of the stadium so she can witness not only the arse whipping coming to those bums but also the joy of being around fellow Big Orange fans during said arse whipping.

Make sure you point out every single sore loser you run across in crimson.

Then, on the way out, take a dump in front of nicks statue .

No way she will ever come back to Tuscaloser after that.
 
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#21
#21
Fightmaker said:
It would seem that way when looking at this situation in a vacuum, but she also roots for Michigan, and says that she hopes Michigan gets to beat Tennessee in football. She was born and raised here. I think I speak for all of us when I say that we are all better off without this kid.
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You are dealing with a classic case of her being a contraire. She says hello when she's leaving. Perhaps even walking backwards and doing things to drive you and her mother nuts incomplete opposition to mundane things you have taught her to do.

My advice? Give her a dose of her own medicine. Become a contraire yourselves. Take a contraire position with small things involving her not everything. Maybe even let her know, "You know I'm going off the reservation here and going to be a contraire about xyz." Then after a while of educating her you and your wife can point it out to her when she embraces being a contraire like going to Bama.

Both of my kids were contraires, still are to this very day. If I said it had to be A then they always very strongly would choose B. Once you figure it out always lobby for A but secretly you preferred a B all along. I've told them both this through the years as adults and they laughingly agree but it still works.

True story. My very academic focused daughter as a freshman in college started running with an absolute loser. Her mother (we're divorced) and brother both called me (rare for my ex) not at the same time imploring me to fly in and put my foot down about her dumping this guy. I agreed to fly in and talk with her. I briefly met the guy and his parents at a function. He was butt ugly, smoked, didn't have a job, was just your basic loser all around with no ambition at all was not even in school. His parents were overjoyed, especially his mother. She saw my daughter as the solution to turn her son around if they could just get married. So later on that evening I met with her and her brother. My son red faced and angry when we got to the subject of the loser and her relationship with him demanded she dump the guy, something she had heard before as the steel trap on her ears rang shut. So finally she asked me my opinion. I told her I thought it was a great idea and the guy looked alright with me and told her mother and brother the same thing. I didn't see an issue if she went forward and they ended up exclusive and down the line married. I flew back to my then home the next morning. My son refusing to talk with for a while he was so angry. She broke up with the guy about 10 days later after having talked about a future with him. We all still to this day laugh about it. I however was terrified at the time but I knew she was a contraire to the bone. I have a similar story about my son growing a scraggly horrible looking beard. His mother and sister called demanding I "do something" about it. I didn't fly in but got a photo of the beard and it was nasty and unkempt and getting long. Same thing discussing how his mom and sister wanted me to do something about his beard. He and laughed how hysterical they were getting about the beard. I told him I could care less grow it down to his knees for all I cared and even encouraged him to make it wackier so his mother and sister would escalate their hysteria about it. We got a good laugh again. Again sister and her mother were furious at my advice I gave him. However the beard was gone in less than 2 weeks. Again it takes courage as I was horrified he looked so stupid but knew in my bones he was a contraire, the more I didn't want it the more he'd push to have it. We all laugh about that one as well these days, lots of contraire stories I have about my kids in their youth.
 
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#22
#22
Fightmaker said:
It would seem that way when looking at this situation in a vacuum, but she also roots for Michigan, and says that she hopes Michigan gets to beat Tennessee in football. She was born and raised here. I think I speak for all of us when I say that we are all better off without this kid.
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Lol… I understand. My niece will be leaving next week to move in at UGA. We’re all proud because it really has become a tough place to get into, but I’ve told her that I plan on tormenting her for the rest of her life.
 
#23
#23
I know my daughter, but I don't know yours.
For me depends on lots of factors ... what is her major? Is Alabama best in class for this major? ... what's her motivation? ... are you committed to paying for her college education? ... is Alabama out of state tuition? ... Do you love the girl like she is your own? ...What is her mom's point of view? ... lots of factors. I have a system's analyst point of view, see below.

I like VOLfrombama's point of view ... I think you, I mean the family, can benefit for seeing all that Bama has to offer on Oct 21st .... time to set up a school visit and be sure to inform them you will be needing tickets to the game for you and your daughter. It is imperative that your daughter MUST experience all that the school has to offer. :^)
Stir up bama rudeness by wearing bright Orange. But unfortunately, you will be required to show dignity in the face of adversity. Good luck!

Monetarily, if I am footing the bill. I have a say. End of discussion. If you want to pay your own way ... suck it up, buttercup.

Biblically, I let would let her go and assuming you love her as much as I love my daughter ... you will wish her well and tell her you will still be here waiting and watching .... when she comes to her senses. Luke 15:13, 20 :^)
If she is rooting for Michigan ... I tell her she should give Michigan a try (for me that will be like suggesting she go roll around in the pig pen) ... especially if she hates the cold. Luke 15:15-16 :^)
If she roots for Michigan to beat Tennessee, she is likely mentally unbalanced, delirious, or her marbles are loose and rolling around and I would recommend counseling (I know a great counselor who loves Tennessee ... who can help her come to her senses). Luke 15:17 :^)

Medically, worse case ... you can try a blood transfusion??? :^) I took my daughter to a game in Neyland Stadium. She has never been the same.

Side note: From a family point of view, my nephew went to Alabama. Major - Alabama is in the running for best in class for his degrees. He was paying for his own education. It was in state tuition for him. Alabama gave him really good scholarship offer. I love my nephew. His parents supported his decision (AND they are BOTH UT grads and his mom grew up an Auburn fan and his dad BLEEDS ORANGE).
He got a great education, he has a high student loan debt after completing his undergrad and masters program. He has a fantastic job in Tennessee and is a jerk of an Alabama fan. Oh and he was an Alabama fan his whole life ... grew up in Huntsville area.
Final note, my nephew is an idiot who cannot think for himself. He reads a liberal point of view and cannot hear any other point of view with any degree of neutrality ... I directly attribute that to the University of Alabama. He went in a level headed kid mostly, and came out with a blind, liberal, socialistic mindset.
 
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