OH NO, more freaking Obama regulations!

[gsvol]

Today, President Obama signed a new executive order creating even more regulation of the economy on top of Obamacare and the EPA.

New Federal Golf Regulations

President Obama has recently appointed a Golf Czar (Elizabeth Warren) and major regulatory changes in the game of golf will become effective January 1, 2013. This is only a preview as the complete rule book (expect 1000+ pages) is being rewritten as people read it and see what’s in it.

Here are a few of the changes.

Golfers with handicaps: - below 10 will have their green fees increased by 35%. - between 11 and 18 will see no increase in green fees. - above 18 will get a $20 check each time they play.

The term “gimmie” will be changed to “entitlement” and will be used as follows: - handicaps below 10, no entitlements. - handicaps from 11 to 17, entitlements for putter length putts. - handicaps above 18, if your ball is on green, no need to putt, just pick it up.

These entitlements are intended to bring about fairness and, most importantly, equality in scoring. In addition, a Player will be limited to a maximum of one birdie or six pars in any given 18-hole round. Any excess must be given to those fellow players who have not yet scored a birdie or par.

This is intended to “re-distribute” the success of winning by making sure that in every competition, the above 18 handicap players will post only “net score” against every other player’s “gross score”. These new Regulations are intended to CHANGE the game of golf.

Golf should be about Fairness. It is not about ability, hard work, practice, and responsibility. Therefore this is “the right thing to do.”

 

[volprof]

I blame the evils of socialism on this one.

 

[gsvol]

I blame the evils of socialism on this one.

Joking aside, several Washington notables refused to play with Bubba Clinton anymore because he cheated on his golf score.

Not only did he cheat on Hitlery, he cheated on himself, but then that's how cheats roll.

 

[volved]

For those who think it could not happen:

Government Mini Golf: The Federal Regulations For Putt-Putt Courses

<not a joke>


Federal register:

The Architectural and Transportation Barriers Compliance Board (Access Board) is issuing final accessibility guidelines to serve as the basis for standards to be adopted by the Department of Justice for new construction and alterations of recreation facilities covered by the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA). The guidelines include scoping and technical provisions for amusement rides, boating facilities, fishing piers and platforms, golf courses, miniature golf, sports facilities, and swimming pools and spas. The guidelines will ensure that newly constructed and altered recreation facilities meet the requirements of the ADA and are readily accessible to and usable by individuals with disabilities.

So what will real golf courses look like after they apply the same standards?

 

[DynamiteMcGhee]

Golf carts with trailer hitches?

 

[gsvol]

For those who think it could not happen:

Government Mini Golf: The Federal Regulations For Putt-Putt Courses

<not a joke>


Federal register:

So what will real golf courses look like after they apply the same standards?

America will have a +18 handicap as long as Obama is president.

In other words, bogie is the new par for the course.

 

[lawgator1]

Yes, the same people who 50 years ago planted those news stories about Obama being born in Hawaii also orchestrated the adoption of the ADA. Thus, even though the act was adopted and regulations have been around for, oh, a little over two decades, it all goes back to Obama.

Sheesz, you have just completely lost your mind at this point.