Things NOT TO say on Valentines Day

[Jasongivm6]

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I only slept with you, because! I was pissed.
*************************

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.
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Roses are red, violets are blue,
sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.
**************************

Of loving beauty you float with grace,
If only you could hide your face.
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Kind, intelligent, loving and hot,
This describes everything you are not.
******************************

I want to feel your sweet embrace,
But don't take that paper bag off of your face.
*******************************

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes --
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!
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My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife --
Marrying you screwed up my life.
************************************

I see your face when I! am dreaming,
That's why I always wake up screaming.
*************************************

My love, you take my breath away --
What have you ste! pped in to smell this way?
*************************************

My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe "Go To Hell."
*************************************

 

[USAF_Vol]

:lol:

 

[hvwarrior58]

lol, thats some funny stuff

 

[la.lovesorange]

I want to feel your sweet embrace,
But don't take that paper bag off of your face.

:lolabove:

 

[orange+white=heaven]

Discovery made at work.
The guys laugh, the gals.... not so much!

 

[wncvolfan]

How about adding some stupid things we've actually said?
Here's one I lived to regret: "I'm sorry you don't like the candy. My first wife really liked the cream centers."

 

[VolunteerHillbilly]

or "Did I tell you to come up for air?"

 

[OWB]

"Don't be mad that I didn't buy you chocolates, I'm just helping you with your weight issues"

 

[Jasongivm6]

"No, you're not ugly. I just don't feel like going out, that's all."
B)

 

[Jasongivm6]

You want to go to the game with me?

But I only have 1 ticket.

 

[Jasongivm6]

Go to the pool?

But, but the Icecapades are coming on.

 

[rockydoc]

"For a fat girl you don't sweat much"

 

[Jasongivm6]

lol: lol: lol: lol:

"For a fat girl you don't sweat much"

 

[vols2345]

hmm something i have really said on valentines day

That's not the way my ex did it......

 

[Jasongivm6]

hmm something i have really said on valentines day

That's not the way my ex did it......

It's almost as bad as saying, "That's not how I hope my next does it."

 

[vols2345]

It's almost as bad as saying, "That's not how I hope my next does it."

yeah well it was about the worse valentines ever and I just put a good cap on it...