DadslilVol
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Dooley coached team can be hazardous to your health.
* A person may experience nausea followed by projectile vomiting.
* Do not eat a big meal before watching a Dooley coached team because a case of explosive diarrhea and the scours may be encountered. A change of clothes and underwear is recommended. You may also experience "dab-its". Dab-its are simply when you cannot wipe anymore you have to dab-it.
* You may also experience periods of occasional psychotic outburst leading one to think you may have Tourette Syndrome, but do not worry the outbursts are completely normal and will diminish as soon as the game is over.
* Xanax, Valium, and alcohol consumption are all viable options to help control the anxiety associated with watching the coaching staff make decisions during games. Paxil is also a good resource for depression related symptoms.
* Heart Palpitations may also be encountered. While most heart palpitations are completely normal it is recommended to seek medical attention if persistent for more than 2 hours after the game.
* If by some accident you drink the "Dool-aid" then call the poison control hotline immediately and induce vomiting to minimize the effects of the toxin on the body.
* If you need a break, don't panic because Dooley will call a Timeout so you can take a bathroom break. That is the only logical conclusion we can come up with due to the timing of some of Dooley's Timeouts.
* You will need to repent of your sins after watching the game because Dooley has been known to cause even the best people to act in ways that are not of normal behavior.
* If you are one of the very few who get to experience a win after watching a game then enjoy it and savior it because it certainly does not happen often and should be enjoyed with extreme care.
* Lastly, Dooley is cursed with bad luck and no one knows who is to blame for the luck but someone out there has worst luck than him but at the time of this warning no such person has come forward...
* Please report any additional side effects in this thread so we can maintain an accurate list in order to help future fans of a Dooley coached team. He will be departing Knoxville soon and his destination at this time is unknown. Dooley is a good man and did some good things for the University but was unable to succeed as the Coach of the Tennessee Volunteers. We wish him well in his future endeavors.
Obviously, this is just for some comedic relief given yet another sickening loss and do think Dooley is generally a good man but was just never the right fit for our team. Thanks for getting us pointed in the right direction but it is now time to turn over the reins and let someone else get us back to the glory land....
* A person may experience nausea followed by projectile vomiting.
* Do not eat a big meal before watching a Dooley coached team because a case of explosive diarrhea and the scours may be encountered. A change of clothes and underwear is recommended. You may also experience "dab-its". Dab-its are simply when you cannot wipe anymore you have to dab-it.
* You may also experience periods of occasional psychotic outburst leading one to think you may have Tourette Syndrome, but do not worry the outbursts are completely normal and will diminish as soon as the game is over.
* Xanax, Valium, and alcohol consumption are all viable options to help control the anxiety associated with watching the coaching staff make decisions during games. Paxil is also a good resource for depression related symptoms.
* Heart Palpitations may also be encountered. While most heart palpitations are completely normal it is recommended to seek medical attention if persistent for more than 2 hours after the game.
* If by some accident you drink the "Dool-aid" then call the poison control hotline immediately and induce vomiting to minimize the effects of the toxin on the body.
* If you need a break, don't panic because Dooley will call a Timeout so you can take a bathroom break. That is the only logical conclusion we can come up with due to the timing of some of Dooley's Timeouts.
* You will need to repent of your sins after watching the game because Dooley has been known to cause even the best people to act in ways that are not of normal behavior.
* If you are one of the very few who get to experience a win after watching a game then enjoy it and savior it because it certainly does not happen often and should be enjoyed with extreme care.
* Lastly, Dooley is cursed with bad luck and no one knows who is to blame for the luck but someone out there has worst luck than him but at the time of this warning no such person has come forward...
* Please report any additional side effects in this thread so we can maintain an accurate list in order to help future fans of a Dooley coached team. He will be departing Knoxville soon and his destination at this time is unknown. Dooley is a good man and did some good things for the University but was unable to succeed as the Coach of the Tennessee Volunteers. We wish him well in his future endeavors.
Obviously, this is just for some comedic relief given yet another sickening loss and do think Dooley is generally a good man but was just never the right fit for our team. Thanks for getting us pointed in the right direction but it is now time to turn over the reins and let someone else get us back to the glory land....
