OrangeEmpire
The White Debonair
- Joined
- Nov 28, 2005
- Messages
- 74,988
- Likes
- 59
So you're driving along and all of a sudden, your car loses most of its power and starts spewing black smoke out the tail pipe. What do you do about it? Well that all depends on your political philosophy...
Libertarians will note that their car has performed well up to this point, but can't help but wonder how much farther it would have run if you hadn't violated you and your car's rights and intervened in how it ran through such things as intrusive regulations mandating periodic oil changes and maintenance services and unjustly taxed yourself in order to pay for gasoline and insurance. You will not spend another dime on the car, nor will you violate its rights any further. You blame the inevitable consequences on gasoline taxes.
Social Conservatives will realize that they've been too lenient with their car and will no longer reward unproductive behavior. They're certainly not going to reward this shirking vehicle with a maintenance service when the local garage can service cars with decent work ethics. You also cancel your insurance policy since it spreads the cost of its bad behavior across all other vehicle owners covered by the same insurer and fails to hold your car fully responsible for its failure. You imprison your car for life and the rest of the cars out there will now have sufficient deterance from breaking down themselves.
The Neo Conservative's car broke down because the kids of the local muslim family who operate the gas station you go to tampered with it. They did this because they hate your freedoms (that your father, who bought the station franchise and then slashed their wages and stopped selling them groceries is something you'd rather not consider). So you park the car, stop paying for insurance and maintenance and then borrow millions to buy yourself a jeep and tripod mounted machine gun. With it, you decide to go and "impose democracy" at the gas station. You hope that by shooting them enough, they will be won over to your way of thinking, and might just shave a few cents per gallon off the price of your gas while they're at it (which your cynical neighbors suggest is the entire reason for your feud with this family in the first place). You expect a warm welcome and endless gratitude, and are shocked when your car gets blown up by the gas station attendant's insurgent kids.
Religious Fundamentalists will conclude that their car breaking down was God's way of punishing society for being tolerant of abortion and homosexuality. They will sell the car for scrap, then proceed to go on T.V and appeal for donations from loyal viewers, promising eternal salvation and reminding them that "prayer partners" are waiting to take their calls should they choose to donate. The proceeds are used to lobby congress for tax cuts for the wealthy.
Progressives will notice that their car, a ford, broke down while the toyota in the next lane did not. From this they conclude that their ford was the victim of discrimination and exploitation in favor of toyotas. This form of oppression, called "toyotaism," permeates every aspect of society. You band together with other ford owners to have consciousness raising groups and take "ford studies" classes at college, so that you can better understand the pervasive workings of "toyota privilige." You eventually take Toyota to court for discrimination and end up getting toyota parts and fluids put in your ford. The ford doesn't run any better. Toyotaism is more pervasive than you thought. When a Toyota owner suggests that most toyotas are newer than your ford and point out that you didn't follow your maintenance schedule, you sue them for "hate speech" and use the proceeds to buy a new vehicle for yourself ... a second hand Toyota!
Socialists and Communists will write a convoluted three volume set of books that completely dissects the internal combustion engine, noting that it is inefficient, a terrible poluter and doomed to break down due to its "internal contradictions." You instead import a huge, bulky coal burning steam engine from Russia, which ends up being vastly more inefficient, dirty and prone to break down then your original engine was. Once you realize your mistake, you give your car to the eastern European gangsters who live in the poor part of town.
Trade Unionists refuse to negotiate with their car until it concedes to their demands for annual increases in fuel economy. The car doesn't give in. After several months of being without a vehicle, you eventually concede and get the damn thing repaired, though the problem has gotten worse and will now cost a fortune to fix, though it would have been cheaper and faster to repair had you used an imported, foreign made part rather than one made domestically by union labor, not to mention the fact that the mechanics don't work a second past one p.m Monday to Thursday unless they're paid triple overtime. At no time in the process do you consider renting a courtesy car, for no "scab" vehicle will take your car's job. Yet it eventually becomes too expensive for you to keep repairing your car in this manner, and buy a brand new car, assembled by children working 14 hour days on the Mexican/American border.
Environmentalists will park the car, refusing to burn any more fossil fuels that contribute to pollution and the hole in the ozone layer. You "spike" the engines of other vehicles, which kill their owners when they try to start them. You don't tell your neighbours that you bought a huge, gas guzzling S.U.V to get you to and from demonstrations and lectures that you give on how S.U.Vs are killing the planet.
Nazis will declare that their car was the victim of a conspiracy Jewish car manufacturers, which make "mechanically inferior" vehicles that require constant repair in garages which also happened to be owned by Jews. You set about destroying every jewish and foreign made vehicle and garage you can find until the rest of the neighborhood declares war on and kills you.
Notice that nobody just fixes the car and gets on with their lives?
Thoughts?
Libertarians will note that their car has performed well up to this point, but can't help but wonder how much farther it would have run if you hadn't violated you and your car's rights and intervened in how it ran through such things as intrusive regulations mandating periodic oil changes and maintenance services and unjustly taxed yourself in order to pay for gasoline and insurance. You will not spend another dime on the car, nor will you violate its rights any further. You blame the inevitable consequences on gasoline taxes.
Social Conservatives will realize that they've been too lenient with their car and will no longer reward unproductive behavior. They're certainly not going to reward this shirking vehicle with a maintenance service when the local garage can service cars with decent work ethics. You also cancel your insurance policy since it spreads the cost of its bad behavior across all other vehicle owners covered by the same insurer and fails to hold your car fully responsible for its failure. You imprison your car for life and the rest of the cars out there will now have sufficient deterance from breaking down themselves.
The Neo Conservative's car broke down because the kids of the local muslim family who operate the gas station you go to tampered with it. They did this because they hate your freedoms (that your father, who bought the station franchise and then slashed their wages and stopped selling them groceries is something you'd rather not consider). So you park the car, stop paying for insurance and maintenance and then borrow millions to buy yourself a jeep and tripod mounted machine gun. With it, you decide to go and "impose democracy" at the gas station. You hope that by shooting them enough, they will be won over to your way of thinking, and might just shave a few cents per gallon off the price of your gas while they're at it (which your cynical neighbors suggest is the entire reason for your feud with this family in the first place). You expect a warm welcome and endless gratitude, and are shocked when your car gets blown up by the gas station attendant's insurgent kids.
Religious Fundamentalists will conclude that their car breaking down was God's way of punishing society for being tolerant of abortion and homosexuality. They will sell the car for scrap, then proceed to go on T.V and appeal for donations from loyal viewers, promising eternal salvation and reminding them that "prayer partners" are waiting to take their calls should they choose to donate. The proceeds are used to lobby congress for tax cuts for the wealthy.
Progressives will notice that their car, a ford, broke down while the toyota in the next lane did not. From this they conclude that their ford was the victim of discrimination and exploitation in favor of toyotas. This form of oppression, called "toyotaism," permeates every aspect of society. You band together with other ford owners to have consciousness raising groups and take "ford studies" classes at college, so that you can better understand the pervasive workings of "toyota privilige." You eventually take Toyota to court for discrimination and end up getting toyota parts and fluids put in your ford. The ford doesn't run any better. Toyotaism is more pervasive than you thought. When a Toyota owner suggests that most toyotas are newer than your ford and point out that you didn't follow your maintenance schedule, you sue them for "hate speech" and use the proceeds to buy a new vehicle for yourself ... a second hand Toyota!
Socialists and Communists will write a convoluted three volume set of books that completely dissects the internal combustion engine, noting that it is inefficient, a terrible poluter and doomed to break down due to its "internal contradictions." You instead import a huge, bulky coal burning steam engine from Russia, which ends up being vastly more inefficient, dirty and prone to break down then your original engine was. Once you realize your mistake, you give your car to the eastern European gangsters who live in the poor part of town.
Trade Unionists refuse to negotiate with their car until it concedes to their demands for annual increases in fuel economy. The car doesn't give in. After several months of being without a vehicle, you eventually concede and get the damn thing repaired, though the problem has gotten worse and will now cost a fortune to fix, though it would have been cheaper and faster to repair had you used an imported, foreign made part rather than one made domestically by union labor, not to mention the fact that the mechanics don't work a second past one p.m Monday to Thursday unless they're paid triple overtime. At no time in the process do you consider renting a courtesy car, for no "scab" vehicle will take your car's job. Yet it eventually becomes too expensive for you to keep repairing your car in this manner, and buy a brand new car, assembled by children working 14 hour days on the Mexican/American border.
Environmentalists will park the car, refusing to burn any more fossil fuels that contribute to pollution and the hole in the ozone layer. You "spike" the engines of other vehicles, which kill their owners when they try to start them. You don't tell your neighbours that you bought a huge, gas guzzling S.U.V to get you to and from demonstrations and lectures that you give on how S.U.Vs are killing the planet.
Nazis will declare that their car was the victim of a conspiracy Jewish car manufacturers, which make "mechanically inferior" vehicles that require constant repair in garages which also happened to be owned by Jews. You set about destroying every jewish and foreign made vehicle and garage you can find until the rest of the neighborhood declares war on and kills you.
Notice that nobody just fixes the car and gets on with their lives?
Thoughts?
