Jeff Tedford Superstar

How good is Cal really? All I keep hearing about is how great this team is. These guys are really getting a lot of media attention this presason. I listened to a California beat writer on sports radio this morning and from the way he was talking you would think the Bears were defending Super Bowl champions. He was almost giddy with excitement.

I started asking myself, how good is this team really? When was the last time they lost? What BCS Bowl did they play in last season? We know USC won the Pac 10 last year but did they at least finish second? I better familiarize myself with these guys because from what I am hearing they are getting ready for a dynasty like run, probably reeling off a few National Championships in the process.

California’s coach, Jeff Tedford, has been a real media darling as of late. I figured I better check him out too. He is the brains behind the machine that is Cal football. How great is his record as a head coach? How many 10 win seasons does he have?

Today I heard him compared to Steve Spurrier so I thought I should look and see how his offense ranked in his conference. After all, the Pac 10 is not known for its defensive prowess. He surely leads the league in total offense.

I’m getting fired up about this guy. He is starting to remind me of Chuck Norris.

• Jeff Tedford doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
• Jeff Tedford once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
• Jeff Teford can divide by zero
• Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Jeff Tedford instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.

I may just have to become a Cal fan myself. I want on the bandwagon. But first, I must do my research.

Want to know what I found out? You want answers? You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth… Sorry, I got carried away there. I think you will find this surprising though. I know I did.

33-17: That is not the average score that Cal beat its opponents by. That, my fellow Volnation members, is Jeff Tedford’s record at Cal. In four years he has averaged over four losses per season. He has done this in a conference that is arguably not the greatest once you get past USC. He did have one 10 win season in 2004 but they weren’t able to build on that success. Not really what I expected so far. There has to be more.

Ok, well records aren’t everything. Tedford probably finished right behind USC in the conference last season, right? I am sure he has won that conference since he has been at Cal, maybe a couple of times. Wrong and wrong. The Bears finished 4-4 in the Pac 10 last season. They lost to USC, UCLA, Oregon and Oregon St. They were 8-4 overall, hardly a BCS team. They finished the season escaping past BYU 35-28 in the Las Vegas Bowl. If you are thinking that bowl is played BEFORE Christmas, you are correct. It’s one of “those” bowl games.

The number of conference championships for Jeff Tedford at Cal: z-e-r-o. In fact, this Bears team is such a powerhouse, they are still trying to follow up on their most recent conference title from 1975.

This is not what I expected so far. This Tedford guy must at least have a high flying offense that leads the nation in passing. After all, this guy is being compared to Steve Spurrier for some reason. The passing stats will start to clarify why Tedford is so highly regarded. Let’s see here. Looking down the page….. still looking…….still looking. Hmm, this can’t be right. According to these stats, California finished 10^th in their conference in total passing last season. For those that don’t know how many teams are in the Pac 10, 10th place is dead last. Let me repeat myself. Say it with me: The California Bears finished dead last in their conference in total passing offense last season. Granted, they had a nice rushing game, finishing second in the league, but from looking at the stats you would have no choice but to classify them as one dimensional.

So what’s all this hype? These guys have not accomplished all that much. Don’t get me wrong, they are a decent football team. I just don’t see the top 10 ranking. Lee Corso is picking these guys to win the National Championship for crying out loud. A team with no conference titles in 30 years. A team fresh off of a measly seven point win over BYU in some Nevada bowl game. I am obviously missing the boat here.

Let’s face it. You can’t vault a team to the top just because they have a lot of guys returning from last year. Can you? If they lost four games last season, surely they could easily lose four games again.

My conlusion is this. After USC lost the title game last year and lost the players they did, the media realized that there needed to be a new kid on the block in the Pac 10. How about UCLA, they pondered? Their coach has improved his record in each of his first three seasons. They are coming off of a nice 10-2 record last year. They even have some tradition. That sounds like a logical choice. No, instead let’s hype up California into the national spotlight. After all, they have Jeff Tedford. It’s common knowledge that on the 7th day, God rested…. and Jeff Tedford took over.