I have emboldened the "compounds" I think might actually be worth dignifying with a response. The rest are even more ridiculous.
First point, of course you cannot find that analysis. Most likely there never was one, and if there was, most likely it was not done objectively. Notre Dame was not ranked at all entering the preseason last year, UT was ranked 3. ND has not won a National Championship since 1988, and between 1996 and 2006, ND never finished in the Top Ten.
On your second bullet, I have never come across a Catholic, with a capitol 'C', Priest who has ever actively recruited for Notre Dame. I doubt that Raghib Ismail was attending Catholic Church through high school. I can most likely same the same for Tony Rice, Chris Zorich, and Jerome Bettis...oh, and Lou Holtz is protestant!
Notre Dame is on TV almost every weekend because NBC thought it in their best interest, financially, to set up a television contract with ND. NBC has no contracts with any other conferences to televise college football, so a Notre Dame game in no way gets in the way of other college football games. If you want to watch, watch. If not, turn it to ABC, CBS, ESPN, ESPN2, ESPNU, FoxSports, CSS, etc. I bet you don't like the Yankees because they have a media contract with YES, the Cubs because of WGN, or the Braves because of TBS?
Notre Dame is not afraid to join a conference. There is just no benefit to Notre Dame joining one. UT arguably has their toughest schedule in years, this year. So far, UT has played 3 top ten teams, and LSU will be in the top 15 when we play them. ND faces that kind of competition every year! Notre Dame does schedule Stanford, Navy, and Army. However, UT plays Kentucky, and Vandy each year, then also schedules at least two easy non conference games (Marshall and Memphis, for example.)