Looking over our rosters for the last few decades I see the problem.

#26
#26
We've had a Pig, a Squirrel, a Cooter, and a Cafego. We've had a Hacksaw, a Peerless, a Sax, and a no-joke US Army General.

Heck, our current roster is rich with All-Name fellas. We've got a Jeudy-Lolly, a Bru, and a hot-damned Nico Iamaleava. We have a Small and a Sampson together in the backfield. We have a Gaston ("no one drinks last Gaston, no one fights like Gaston..."). We have a Weathersby. We have a Shamurad Umarov. We have a Weary and a Leacock and a 250-pound Salmon. For heaven's sake, we have a Navy!

And we have coaches named Heupel, Ekeler, and Halzle. We have a fella named Jean-Mary. We have our own Pope.

I'd say we're doin' okayin the All-Name competition.

Go Vols!

[thanks, Pimo, for the smiles]
 
Last edited:
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#29
#29
pimo1 said:
We do not have enough all-name guys on our rosters. There is a severe lack of Koolaids, Sauces and so on. I was looking up an NFL all-time name list and in the top 50 Not one former Vols.

  1. Chad OchoCinco (Retired, WR, Cincinnati Bengals)
  2. Dick Butkus (Retired, Bears)
  3. Ha Ha Clinton-Dix (Retired, Safety, Green Bay Packers) - We're sure a few laughs were had about this
  4. Barkevious Mingo (OL, Atlanta Falcons) - How do people come up with these names?
  5. Guy Whimper (Tackle, Jaguars) - Sounds like such a scary guy
  6. D'Brickashaw Ferguson (Retired, OT, New York Jets)
  7. Captain Munnerlyn (Retired, CB)
  8. BenJarvus Green-Ellis (Retired, RB, Cincinnati Bengals) - This one is a real mouthful
  9. Fair Hooker (Retired, Browns) - Were his parents thinking at all when they name him?
  10. John David Booty (FA, Vikings)
  11. Earthwind Moreland - (Retired, CB) - He has to love nature right?
  12. Richie Incognito (Guard, Dolphins) - Must of been hard to find him on the field sometimes
  13. Tiki Barber - (Retired, RB, New York Giants)
  14. Prince Amukamara (CB, New Orleans Saints)
  15. Frostee Rucker (Retired, DE, Las Vegas Raiders)
  16. Tshimanga Biakabutuka (Retired, RB, Panthers) - where do you start trying to pronounce this name?
  17. Ben Gay (Retired, Browns)
  18. Aqib Talib (CB, Bucs) - This seems like a tongue-twister
  19. Rex Grossman (Retired, QB, Redskins)
  20. Ashton Youboty (Retired, Jaguars) - It just sounds wrong and dirty
  21. C.J. Ah You (Retired, Rams) - We wonder does he have allergies?
  22. General Booty (QB, Oklahoma Sooners)
  23. Coy Bacon (Retrired, DL)
  24. Hercules Mata’afa (DE, New Jersey Generals)
  25. Bronko Nagurski (Retired, FB, Chicago Bears) - We feel real sorry for the sports commentators here
  26. Rock Ya Sin (CB, Baltimore Ravens)
  27. Kyu Blu Kelly (CB, Seattle Seahawks)
  28. JuJu Smith Schuster (WR, New England Patriots) - sounds like a fun dance
  29. Sauce Gardner (CB, New York Jets)
  30. Legedu Naanee (Retired, WR, Miami Dolphins)
  31. Tedy Bruschi (Retired, LB, New England Patriots) - This has to be one of the most unusual/funniest NFL name out there right?
  32. Jake Butt (Retired, TE)
  33. Champ Bailey (Retired, CB, Denver Broncos)
  34. Key’vantanie “Keke” Coutee (WR, New Orleans Saints) - He definitely has Drake's Keke, Do you love me? on repeat
  35. Troy Aumua Polamalu (Retired, SS, Pittsburgh Steelers)
  36. T.J. Houshmandzadeh (Retired, WR)
  37. Uche Nwaneri (Retired, Guard) - This has to be one of the most unusual/funniest NFL name out there right?
  38. Ikponmwosa Igbinosun (DE, Jacksonville Jaguars)
  39. Greedy Williams - Philadelphia Eagles
  40. Prince Tega Wanogho - Kansas City Chiefs
  41. JuJu Smith-Schuster - New England Patriots
  42. Equanimeous St. Brown - Chicago Bears
  43. Haha Clinton-Dix - Free agent
The raiders used to have a corner with a crazy name a couple years ago too Divine Deablo. We never get those guys man thats our problem.
Click to expand...
At least we had Jim Bob Cooter who coached in NFL
 
#30
#30
LTVol said:
At least we had Jim Bob Cooter who coached in NFL
Click to expand...
As I said that was like 20 years ago..We had more of it back then and Also won a natty which kinda proves my point. In the 80's and 90's and early 2000's we had some guys in the all-name team conversation. But these days we cant compete when teams are rolling out guys named after condiments and children's beverages. Its an arms race and we are losing. I am doing my part and on Valentine day laid the seed to produce quadruplets who will have the most epic names I can find on the ingredients list of Cool Ranch Doritos.. they will be like a Wutang song.
 
#32
#32
Folks have already mentioned these names, but I wish we had had Pig and Squirrel on field at the same time.

Only thing better might have been a Moose and Squirrel.
 
#33
#33
Vol8188 said:
I wouldn’t put much stock in a list with that many errors. Mingo was an edge player, not an offensive linemen and they list multiple players multiple times
Click to expand...
Breaking the 4th wall a bit here but if you are gonna pick apart pay closer attention if you notice the top of the list I found on some site hence the links.. The ones at the bottom I manually entered from and I Purposely put some on twice because of their names it was part of the joke. As far as Mingo I got no idea on that one bro.. h never came close to playing offense but did have one rush on a fake punt? Hell he never played for the falcons he got arrested and cut right after signing with them. But the point of the thread is the luls. The names and all of those are accurate and hilarious. At the Possum post we dont do no fact checking its all about hitting hard and disappearing into the night.. which I do now like a donkey punch.
 
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#35
#35
pimo1 said:
We do not have enough all-name guys on our rosters. There is a severe lack of Koolaids, Sauces and so on. I was looking up an NFL all-time name list and in the top 50 Not one former Vols.

  1. Chad OchoCinco (Retired, WR, Cincinnati Bengals)
  2. Dick Butkus (Retired, Bears)
  3. Ha Ha Clinton-Dix (Retired, Safety, Green Bay Packers) - We're sure a few laughs were had about this
  4. Barkevious Mingo (OL, Atlanta Falcons) - How do people come up with these names?
  5. Guy Whimper (Tackle, Jaguars) - Sounds like such a scary guy
  6. D'Brickashaw Ferguson (Retired, OT, New York Jets)
  7. Captain Munnerlyn (Retired, CB)
  8. BenJarvus Green-Ellis (Retired, RB, Cincinnati Bengals) - This one is a real mouthful
  9. Fair Hooker (Retired, Browns) - Were his parents thinking at all when they name him?
  10. John David Booty (FA, Vikings)
  11. Earthwind Moreland - (Retired, CB) - He has to love nature right?
  12. Richie Incognito (Guard, Dolphins) - Must of been hard to find him on the field sometimes
  13. Tiki Barber - (Retired, RB, New York Giants)
  14. Prince Amukamara (CB, New Orleans Saints)
  15. Frostee Rucker (Retired, DE, Las Vegas Raiders)
  16. Tshimanga Biakabutuka (Retired, RB, Panthers) - where do you start trying to pronounce this name?
  17. Ben Gay (Retired, Browns)
  18. Aqib Talib (CB, Bucs) - This seems like a tongue-twister
  19. Rex Grossman (Retired, QB, Redskins)
  20. Ashton Youboty (Retired, Jaguars) - It just sounds wrong and dirty
  21. C.J. Ah You (Retired, Rams) - We wonder does he have allergies?
  22. General Booty (QB, Oklahoma Sooners)
  23. Coy Bacon (Retrired, DL)
  24. Hercules Mata’afa (DE, New Jersey Generals)
  25. Bronko Nagurski (Retired, FB, Chicago Bears) - We feel real sorry for the sports commentators here
  26. Rock Ya Sin (CB, Baltimore Ravens)
  27. Kyu Blu Kelly (CB, Seattle Seahawks)
  28. JuJu Smith Schuster (WR, New England Patriots) - sounds like a fun dance
  29. Sauce Gardner (CB, New York Jets)
  30. Legedu Naanee (Retired, WR, Miami Dolphins)
  31. Tedy Bruschi (Retired, LB, New England Patriots) - This has to be one of the most unusual/funniest NFL name out there right?
  32. Jake Butt (Retired, TE)
  33. Champ Bailey (Retired, CB, Denver Broncos)
  34. Key’vantanie “Keke” Coutee (WR, New Orleans Saints) - He definitely has Drake's Keke, Do you love me? on repeat
  35. Troy Aumua Polamalu (Retired, SS, Pittsburgh Steelers)
  36. T.J. Houshmandzadeh (Retired, WR)
  37. Uche Nwaneri (Retired, Guard) - This has to be one of the most unusual/funniest NFL name out there right?
  38. Ikponmwosa Igbinosun (DE, Jacksonville Jaguars)
  39. Greedy Williams - Philadelphia Eagles
  40. Prince Tega Wanogho - Kansas City Chiefs
  41. JuJu Smith-Schuster - New England Patriots
  42. Equanimeous St. Brown - Chicago Bears
  43. Haha Clinton-Dix - Free agent
The raiders used to have a corner with a crazy name a couple years ago too Divine Deablo. We never get those guys man thats our problem.
Click to expand...
We had the Admiral playing basketball.
 
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#36
#36
Jim Bob Cooter, now that is an all world name.
9693376.jpeg
 
#37
#37
pimo1 said:
We do not have enough all-name guys on our rosters. There is a severe lack of Koolaids, Sauces and so on. I was looking up an NFL all-time name list and in the top 50 Not one former Vols.

  1. Chad OchoCinco (Retired, WR, Cincinnati Bengals)
  2. Dick Butkus (Retired, Bears)
  3. Ha Ha Clinton-Dix (Retired, Safety, Green Bay Packers) - We're sure a few laughs were had about this
  4. Barkevious Mingo (OL, Atlanta Falcons) - How do people come up with these names?
  5. Guy Whimper (Tackle, Jaguars) - Sounds like such a scary guy
  6. D'Brickashaw Ferguson (Retired, OT, New York Jets)
  7. Captain Munnerlyn (Retired, CB)
  8. BenJarvus Green-Ellis (Retired, RB, Cincinnati Bengals) - This one is a real mouthful
  9. Fair Hooker (Retired, Browns) - Were his parents thinking at all when they name him?
  10. John David Booty (FA, Vikings)
  11. Earthwind Moreland - (Retired, CB) - He has to love nature right?
  12. Richie Incognito (Guard, Dolphins) - Must of been hard to find him on the field sometimes
  13. Tiki Barber - (Retired, RB, New York Giants)
  14. Prince Amukamara (CB, New Orleans Saints)
  15. Frostee Rucker (Retired, DE, Las Vegas Raiders)
  16. Tshimanga Biakabutuka (Retired, RB, Panthers) - where do you start trying to pronounce this name?
  17. Ben Gay (Retired, Browns)
  18. Aqib Talib (CB, Bucs) - This seems like a tongue-twister
  19. Rex Grossman (Retired, QB, Redskins)
  20. Ashton Youboty (Retired, Jaguars) - It just sounds wrong and dirty
  21. C.J. Ah You (Retired, Rams) - We wonder does he have allergies?
  22. General Booty (QB, Oklahoma Sooners)
  23. Coy Bacon (Retrired, DL)
  24. Hercules Mata’afa (DE, New Jersey Generals)
  25. Bronko Nagurski (Retired, FB, Chicago Bears) - We feel real sorry for the sports commentators here
  26. Rock Ya Sin (CB, Baltimore Ravens)
  27. Kyu Blu Kelly (CB, Seattle Seahawks)
  28. JuJu Smith Schuster (WR, New England Patriots) - sounds like a fun dance
  29. Sauce Gardner (CB, New York Jets)
  30. Legedu Naanee (Retired, WR, Miami Dolphins)
  31. Tedy Bruschi (Retired, LB, New England Patriots) - This has to be one of the most unusual/funniest NFL name out there right?
  32. Jake Butt (Retired, TE)
  33. Champ Bailey (Retired, CB, Denver Broncos)
  34. Key’vantanie “Keke” Coutee (WR, New Orleans Saints) - He definitely has Drake's Keke, Do you love me? on repeat
  35. Troy Aumua Polamalu (Retired, SS, Pittsburgh Steelers)
  36. T.J. Houshmandzadeh (Retired, WR)
  37. Uche Nwaneri (Retired, Guard) - This has to be one of the most unusual/funniest NFL name out there right?
  38. Ikponmwosa Igbinosun (DE, Jacksonville Jaguars)
  39. Greedy Williams - Philadelphia Eagles
  40. Prince Tega Wanogho - Kansas City Chiefs
  41. JuJu Smith-Schuster - New England Patriots
  42. Equanimeous St. Brown - Chicago Bears
  43. Haha Clinton-Dix - Free agent
The raiders used to have a corner with a crazy name a couple years ago too Divine Deablo. We never get those guys man thats our problem.
Click to expand...

Well, the story behind the story is one player doesn't make a team; these guys played with a great supporting cast.
 
#44
#44
LouderVol said:
Warrior, two Slaughters. NAVY shuler, Chandavian Bradley
Click to expand...
None of those names have the full effect.... Slaughter and even Warrior are not as uncommon surnames as you might think...Navy only hits like it does in Knoxville and Bradley cancels the magic of Chandavian right out. Now give me a Peaceful Slaughter and you're cooking. Itinerant Warrior.. thats cool stuff. The full name has to pop and have universal wtf attached....see here I was trying to slink away.
 
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#45
#45
Tman44 said:
They missed the best NFL name ever:

Chris Fuamatu-Maʻafala​


"He's a BAD Ma'afala"
Click to expand...
Yeah, I thought of him also especially if Polamalu made on the list.

As he was lead blocker for Bettis, the Steeler radio broadcasters sometimes called him the Bus Driver
 
#48
#48
pimo1 said:
None of those names have the full effect.... Slaughter and even Warrior are not as uncommon surnames as you might think...Navy only hits like it does in Knoxville and Bradley cancels the magic of Chandavian right out. Now give me a Peaceful Slaughter and you're cooking. Itinerant Warrior.. thats cool stuff. The full name has to pop and have universal wtf attached....see here I was trying to slink away.
Click to expand...
Renegade Warrior? Berserker Eriksson? Claw mac Clawson?
 
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#49
#49
pimo1 said:
We do not have enough all-name guys on our rosters. There is a severe lack of Koolaids, Sauces and so on. I was looking up an NFL all-time name list and in the top 50 Not one former Vols.

  1. Chad OchoCinco (Retired, WR, Cincinnati Bengals)
  2. Dick Butkus (Retired, Bears)
  3. Ha Ha Clinton-Dix (Retired, Safety, Green Bay Packers) - We're sure a few laughs were had about this
  4. Barkevious Mingo (OL, Atlanta Falcons) - How do people come up with these names?
  5. Guy Whimper (Tackle, Jaguars) - Sounds like such a scary guy
  6. D'Brickashaw Ferguson (Retired, OT, New York Jets)
  7. Captain Munnerlyn (Retired, CB)
  8. BenJarvus Green-Ellis (Retired, RB, Cincinnati Bengals) - This one is a real mouthful
  9. Fair Hooker (Retired, Browns) - Were his parents thinking at all when they name him?
  10. John David Booty (FA, Vikings)
  11. Earthwind Moreland - (Retired, CB) - He has to love nature right?
  12. Richie Incognito (Guard, Dolphins) - Must of been hard to find him on the field sometimes
  13. Tiki Barber - (Retired, RB, New York Giants)
  14. Prince Amukamara (CB, New Orleans Saints)
  15. Frostee Rucker (Retired, DE, Las Vegas Raiders)
  16. Tshimanga Biakabutuka (Retired, RB, Panthers) - where do you start trying to pronounce this name?
  17. Ben Gay (Retired, Browns)
  18. Aqib Talib (CB, Bucs) - This seems like a tongue-twister
  19. Rex Grossman (Retired, QB, Redskins)
  20. Ashton Youboty (Retired, Jaguars) - It just sounds wrong and dirty
  21. C.J. Ah You (Retired, Rams) - We wonder does he have allergies?
  22. General Booty (QB, Oklahoma Sooners)
  23. Coy Bacon (Retrired, DL)
  24. Hercules Mata’afa (DE, New Jersey Generals)
  25. Bronko Nagurski (Retired, FB, Chicago Bears) - We feel real sorry for the sports commentators here
  26. Rock Ya Sin (CB, Baltimore Ravens)
  27. Kyu Blu Kelly (CB, Seattle Seahawks)
  28. JuJu Smith Schuster (WR, New England Patriots) - sounds like a fun dance
  29. Sauce Gardner (CB, New York Jets)
  30. Legedu Naanee (Retired, WR, Miami Dolphins)
  31. Tedy Bruschi (Retired, LB, New England Patriots) - This has to be one of the most unusual/funniest NFL name out there right?
  32. Jake Butt (Retired, TE)
  33. Champ Bailey (Retired, CB, Denver Broncos)
  34. Key’vantanie “Keke” Coutee (WR, New Orleans Saints) - He definitely has Drake's Keke, Do you love me? on repeat
  35. Troy Aumua Polamalu (Retired, SS, Pittsburgh Steelers)
  36. T.J. Houshmandzadeh (Retired, WR)
  37. Uche Nwaneri (Retired, Guard) - This has to be one of the most unusual/funniest NFL name out there right?
  38. Ikponmwosa Igbinosun (DE, Jacksonville Jaguars)
  39. Greedy Williams - Philadelphia Eagles
  40. Prince Tega Wanogho - Kansas City Chiefs
  41. JuJu Smith-Schuster - New England Patriots
  42. Equanimeous St. Brown - Chicago Bears
  43. Haha Clinton-Dix - Free agent
  44. Kool-Aid McKinstry
The raiders used to have a corner with a crazy name a couple years ago too Divine Deablo. We never get those guys man thats our problem.
Click to expand...
Ha Ha Clinton-Dix is on your list twice (#3 and #43). Kool-Aid McKinstry (#44) has never been on an NFL roster - come back to see us is in several months.
 
#50
#50
pimo1 said:
We do not have enough all-name guys on our rosters. There is a severe lack of Koolaids, Sauces and so on. I was looking up an NFL all-time name list and in the top 50 Not one former Vols.

  1. Chad OchoCinco (Retired, WR, Cincinnati Bengals)
  2. Dick Butkus (Retired, Bears)
  3. Ha Ha Clinton-Dix (Retired, Safety, Green Bay Packers) - We're sure a few laughs were had about this
  4. Barkevious Mingo (OL, Atlanta Falcons) - How do people come up with these names?
  5. Guy Whimper (Tackle, Jaguars) - Sounds like such a scary guy
  6. D'Brickashaw Ferguson (Retired, OT, New York Jets)
  7. Captain Munnerlyn (Retired, CB)
  8. BenJarvus Green-Ellis (Retired, RB, Cincinnati Bengals) - This one is a real mouthful
  9. Fair Hooker (Retired, Browns) - Were his parents thinking at all when they name him?
  10. John David Booty (FA, Vikings)
  11. Earthwind Moreland - (Retired, CB) - He has to love nature right?
  12. Richie Incognito (Guard, Dolphins) - Must of been hard to find him on the field sometimes
  13. Tiki Barber - (Retired, RB, New York Giants)
  14. Prince Amukamara (CB, New Orleans Saints)
  15. Frostee Rucker (Retired, DE, Las Vegas Raiders)
  16. Tshimanga Biakabutuka (Retired, RB, Panthers) - where do you start trying to pronounce this name?
  17. Ben Gay (Retired, Browns)
  18. Aqib Talib (CB, Bucs) - This seems like a tongue-twister
  19. Rex Grossman (Retired, QB, Redskins)
  20. Ashton Youboty (Retired, Jaguars) - It just sounds wrong and dirty
  21. C.J. Ah You (Retired, Rams) - We wonder does he have allergies?
  22. General Booty (QB, Oklahoma Sooners)
  23. Coy Bacon (Retrired, DL)
  24. Hercules Mata’afa (DE, New Jersey Generals)
  25. Bronko Nagurski (Retired, FB, Chicago Bears) - We feel real sorry for the sports commentators here
  26. Rock Ya Sin (CB, Baltimore Ravens)
  27. Kyu Blu Kelly (CB, Seattle Seahawks)
  28. JuJu Smith Schuster (WR, New England Patriots) - sounds like a fun dance
  29. Sauce Gardner (CB, New York Jets)
  30. Legedu Naanee (Retired, WR, Miami Dolphins)
  31. Tedy Bruschi (Retired, LB, New England Patriots) - This has to be one of the most unusual/funniest NFL name out there right?
  32. Jake Butt (Retired, TE)
  33. Champ Bailey (Retired, CB, Denver Broncos)
  34. Key’vantanie “Keke” Coutee (WR, New Orleans Saints) - He definitely has Drake's Keke, Do you love me? on repeat
  35. Troy Aumua Polamalu (Retired, SS, Pittsburgh Steelers)
  36. T.J. Houshmandzadeh (Retired, WR)
  37. Uche Nwaneri (Retired, Guard) - This has to be one of the most unusual/funniest NFL name out there right?
  38. Ikponmwosa Igbinosun (DE, Jacksonville Jaguars)
  39. Greedy Williams - Philadelphia Eagles
  40. Prince Tega Wanogho - Kansas City Chiefs
  41. JuJu Smith-Schuster - New England Patriots
  42. Equanimeous St. Brown - Chicago Bears
  43. Haha Clinton-Dix - Free agent
  44. Kool-Aid McKinstry
The raiders used to have a corner with a crazy name a couple years ago too Divine Deablo. We never get those guys man thats our problem.
Click to expand...
I'm naming my dog Barkevious if I ever get a new one.
 
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