Needing prayers.

[Tin Man]

There is no beauty without flaws.
There is no life lived without scars.
Forgive yourself your imperfections and greet each day willing to be your best. When you fail, assess this, learn from it, and recommit.

 

[malinoisvol]

Electrical panel arc out.

Dam!

 

[82_VOL_83]

please continue to keep my wife in your thoughts and prayers

Physically, she's pretty strong, walking a lot, but has zero safety awareness.
On her cognitive assessment on Thursday, she scored 0 out of a possible 15, with 15 being best and 0 being worst.
She has about 12-15 words she is using, but it's very difficult to interpret what she's saying.
The speech therapist says she refuses to try to eat, means no swallow test, so she's still on the feeding tube (has been since 3/11). So she's still NPO, except for crushed ice.
Today's visit was good. I think her facial expressions were more like her old self.
Cancer can EABOD and swaller.

On the way home, I stopped in @volfanbill 's old neck of the woods for some Chinese and got home in time to watch the baseball game.

As I'm typing this, Curley and Moore went yard.

Bless you Gordo and your family. I can't even imagine.

 

[volwindy]

View attachment 645246

A house in my neighborhood went up in flames last month, they all got out, including pets. It's hard to look at and think what they are going through when we go by it.

 

[Pennheel]

Well,I meant to come on here a bit earlier to give thanks for the prayers and kind people here on Volnation. I tried to keep myself busy with helping my family to sell their house to having a wonderful date night with my fiancee. It gave me that bit of peace of mind and joy I needed.

I wrote a letter and showed it to my family about what I'm going through since they're literally next door. My mother recommended me that I show my fiancee (she used to be in the counseling field and is always willing to listen) and my therapist. It helps to have that support system.

@VolNExile thanks for the kind words that you've shared. It means a lot that you shared that last night.

@joevol33 Thanks!! That is also why I feel so comfortable on here myself. I hope and pray things are going well with your wife and family.

@Tin Man I've been there myself. I think this year has been especially that way for me. I used to bounce back and it's become harder with age and thinking about life. I know this too shall pass though. I really liked the poem.

@orangeslice I pray that therapy goes as well for you as it has for me.

If I have left anyone out,that is not my intent because I thank you all more than you know. God bless and hope that everyone has a good and restful evening.

 

[VolNExile]

Well,I meant to come on here a bit earlier to give thanks for the prayers and kind people here on Volnation. I tried to keep myself busy with helping my family to sell their house to having a wonderful date night with my fiancee. It gave me that bit of peace of mind and joy I needed.

I wrote a letter and showed it to my family about what I'm going through since they're literally next door. My mother recommended me that I show my fiancee (she used to be in the counseling field and is always willing to listen) and my therapist. It helps to have that support system.

@VolNExile thanks for the kind words that you've shared. It means a lot that you shared that last night.

@joevol33 Thanks!! That is also why I feel so comfortable on here myself. I hope and pray things are going well with your wife and family.

@Tin Man I've been there myself. I think this year has been especially that way for me. I used to bounce back and it's become harder with age and thinking about life. I know this too shall pass though. I really liked the poem.

@orangeslice I pray that therapy goes as well for you as it has for me.

If I have left anyone out,that is not my intent because I thank you all more than you know. God bless and hope that everyone has a good and restful evening.

Thanks for coming back to update. We carry you in our hearts.

 

[vollygirl]

This place is a blessing.

 

[Pennheel]

This place is a blessing.

It truly is,I have to agree

 

[Pennheel]

Well,after thinking that I'd overcome my depression symptoms for the day at least,life threw me and my family a curveball at about 10:30 tonight. My families sweet little pomeranian Willow had a bit of a upset stomach the last few days, and had been eating grass a lot. Well,she continued to do it so they gave her some Pepto Bismol and she had thrown it up like she did the grass. We considered taking her to the vet Tommorow. Well,after hours of heavy panting,she crossed the rainbow Bridge laying in my step-dads lap tonight. We're all torn to pieces of course because we thought she was following us to NC because she was full of energy a couple of weeks ago.

She was 12 years old. I can take solace in knowing that she was loved and absolutely spoiled rotten. I also know that she isn't suffering any longer. Just keep my family in your prayers because they've been through a lot,and having a hard time selling their home now this. It's heartbreaking

I'll probably binge watch some TV most of the night and early morning until I fall asleep.

 

[joevol33]

Well,after thinking that I'd overcome my depression symptoms for the day at least,life threw me and my family a curveball at about 10:30 tonight. My families sweet little pomeranian Willow had a bit of a upset stomach the last few days, and had been eating grass a lot. Well,she continued to do it so they gave her some Pepto Bismol and she had thrown it up like she did the grass. We considered taking her to the vet Tommorow. Well,after hours of heavy panting,she crossed the rainbow Bridge laying in my step-dads lap tonight. We're all torn to pieces of course because we thought she was following us to NC because she was full of energy a couple of weeks ago.

She was 12 years old. I can take solace in knowing that she was loved and absolutely spoiled rotten. I also know that she isn't suffering any longer. Just keep my family in your prayers because they've been through a lot,and having a hard time selling their home now this. It's heartbreaking

I'll probably binge watch some TV most of the night and early morning until I fall asleep.

Sorry man, that hurts I know

 

[VolNExile]

Well,after thinking that I'd overcome my depression symptoms for the day at least,life threw me and my family a curveball at about 10:30 tonight. My families sweet little pomeranian Willow had a bit of a upset stomach the last few days, and had been eating grass a lot. Well,she continued to do it so they gave her some Pepto Bismol and she had thrown it up like she did the grass. We considered taking her to the vet Tommorow. Well,after hours of heavy panting,she crossed the rainbow Bridge laying in my step-dads lap tonight. We're all torn to pieces of course because we thought she was following us to NC because she was full of energy a couple of weeks ago.

She was 12 years old. I can take solace in knowing that she was loved and absolutely spoiled rotten. I also know that she isn't suffering any longer. Just keep my family in your prayers because they've been through a lot,and having a hard time selling their home now this. It's heartbreaking

I'll probably binge watch some TV most of the night and early morning until I fall asleep.

Sorry, Pennheel. How awful for everyone.

 

[Orangeslice13]

Well,I meant to come on here a bit earlier to give thanks for the prayers and kind people here on Volnation. I tried to keep myself busy with helping my family to sell their house to having a wonderful date night with my fiancee. It gave me that bit of peace of mind and joy I needed.

I wrote a letter and showed it to my family about what I'm going through since they're literally next door. My mother recommended me that I show my fiancee (she used to be in the counseling field and is always willing to listen) and my therapist. It helps to have that support system.

@VolNExile thanks for the kind words that you've shared. It means a lot that you shared that last night.

@joevol33 Thanks!! That is also why I feel so comfortable on here myself. I hope and pray things are going well with your wife and family.

@Tin Man I've been there myself. I think this year has been especially that way for me. I used to bounce back and it's become harder with age and thinking about life. I know this too shall pass though. I really liked the poem.

@orangeslice I pray that therapy goes as well for you as it has for me.

If I have left anyone out,that is not my intent because I thank you all more than you know. God bless and hope that everyone has a good and restful evening.

Got to be honest…..we’re not off to a great start. We actually are but when the damn breaks it ain’t pretty.

With out going into great detail, I was sexually assaulted at 19 years old by a female x-ray technician. Even now I struggle to tell the truth about it. Rape would be a more accurate description. It’s hard enough when things like this happen but add to it the one friend I confided in responds with “you’re so lucky”. Funny, I have hated myself for 34 years for letting it happen. Confided in Red about 6 weeks ago. The kicker was she was in the weighting room when it happened. Unbelievable relief in admitting it and unbelievable mercy from my lovely wife. The problem….the ugly side of me is strong. My inner voice is very damaging and with my father gone, who was my voice of reason, I’ve come almost completely unglued. Maybe the real reason I sold out of my company.

The point….if anyone of you fine people are suffering, get the help you need. Don’t stumble through hell alone because of foolish pride.



But I digress

 

[Pennheel]

Got to be honest…..we’re not off to a great start. We actually are but when the damn breaks it ain’t pretty.

With out going into great detail, I was sexually assaulted at 19 years old by a female x-ray technician. Even now I struggle to tell the truth about it. Rape would be a more accurate description. It’s hard enough when things like this happen but add to it the one friend I confided in responds with “you’re so lucky”. Funny, I have hated myself for 34 years for letting it happen. Confided in Red about 6 weeks ago. The kicker was she was in the weighting room when it happened. Unbelievable relief in admitting it and unbelievable mercy from my lovely wife. The problem….the ugly side of me is strong. My inner voice is very damaging and with my father gone, who was my voice of reason, I’ve come almost completely unglued. Maybe the real reason I sold out of my company.

The point….if anyone of you fine people are suffering, get the help you need. Don’t stumble through hell alone because of foolish pride.



But I digress

I am really,really sorry that you had to experience that. It sounds like you have a wonderful support system in your wife. I'm happy that you found someone to speak to about it,and not hold it in. It's never too late to get the help you need,my friend and I'm glad you're taking the steps to do so.

I absolutely agree that anyone out there going through anything seriously troubling you in life,don't ever feel ashamed in doing so because it takes a big person to admit when they need help,and that's okay!

 

[McDad]

Got to be honest…..we’re not off to a great start. We actually are but when the damn breaks it ain’t pretty.

With out going into great detail, I was sexually assaulted at 19 years old by a female x-ray technician. Even now I struggle to tell the truth about it. Rape would be a more accurate description. It’s hard enough when things like this happen but add to it the one friend I confided in responds with “you’re so lucky”. Funny, I have hated myself for 34 years for letting it happen. Confided in Red about 6 weeks ago. The kicker was she was in the weighting room when it happened. Unbelievable relief in admitting it and unbelievable mercy from my lovely wife. The problem….the ugly side of me is strong. My inner voice is very damaging and with my father gone, who was my voice of reason, I’ve come almost completely unglued. Maybe the real reason I sold out of my company.

The point….if anyone of you fine people are suffering, get the help you need. Don’t stumble through hell alone because of foolish pride.



But I digress

It's not your fault, Slice.

Please give yourself the at least the same love, forgiveness, grace and forgiveness you give to others.

 

[WestTennesseeFox]

Don't let anyone victim shame you @Orangeslice13.

 

[Orangeslice13]

It's not your fault, Slice.

Please give yourself the at least the same love, forgiveness, grace and forgiveness you give to others.

The unrealized problem I have is I had no idea how bed I view myself and how my inner voice speaks to me. Dr M. Stopped me and said “I hear a lot of mercy for others when you speak but none for you, were you aware of that?”
I was not aware. And now that I am I realize the ugly side of me is strong.

I’m a “get your **** together” kinda guy. I don’t show emotions at all. Not to anyone except Red and even then it’s minimal. I’m crying like a little girl reading a romance novel now for often no reason at all. I asked Red this morning “what the **** is wrong with me!?!?” And she said “Awww baby, you are a human after all”.

The other thing that’s odd is it’s the great shame of my life and something I’ve hidden for decades but now I’m very openly sharing it. I feel like by doing so I now have nothing to hide……the mind is weird

 

[Orangeslice13]

funny story
I’m no longer allowed to let my inner voice say bad things to me. When it happens I stop it by shaking my head and saying “nope” or “stop” do that in an airport or a Home Depot and suddenly nobody wants to stand near you

 

[McDad]

funny story
I’m no longer allowed to let my inner voice say bad things to me. When it happens I stop it by shaking my head and saying “nope” or “stop” do that in an airport or a Home Depot and suddenly nobody wants to stand near you

Let's be honest, they didn't want to stand next to you even before your crazy was on full display.

 

[McDad]

The unrealized problem I have is I had no idea how bed I view myself and how my inner voice speaks to me. Dr M. Stopped me and said “I hear a lot of mercy for others when you speak but none for you, were you aware of that?”
I was not aware. And now that I am I realize the ugly side of me is strong.

I’m a “get your **** together” kinda guy. I don’t show emotions at all. Not to anyone except Red and even then it’s minimal. I’m crying like a little girl reading a romance novel now for often no reason at all. I asked Red this morning “what the **** is wrong with me!?!?” And she said “Awww baby, you are a human after all”.

The other thing that’s odd is it’s the great shame of my life and something I’ve hidden for decades but now I’m very openly sharing it. I feel like by doing so I now have nothing to hide……the mind is weird

I don't wanna share too much but I work with adults. Business owners. Your dynamic is alarmingly common and tough as heck to replace with a healthier habit.

You like to compete (I think). Image you've got two people inside of you. A really great version...the guy who shows up for everyone else. And the nasty, horrible person you keep for yourself. You've got to imagine getting in the boxing ring everyday and beat the toxic person into submission.

 

[Orangeslice13]

I don't wanna share too much but I work with adults. Business owners. Your dynamic is alarmingly common and tough as heck to replace with a healthier habit.

You like to compete (I think). Image you've got two people inside of you. A really great version...the guy who shows up for everyone else. And the nasty, horrible person you keep for yourself. You've got to imagine getting in the boxing ring everyday and beat the toxic person into submission.

I was an all American swimmer. I have multiple black belts. I am 7-0 in professional mma cage fights and have been self employed my whole life. (Had part time work for insurance at times) ya, I like to compete. The self/inner self you describe is absolutely me too.

 

[Orangeslice13]

@McDad
I have, most of the time, been able to use the ugly side of me for good. But it’s definitely there.

 

[McDad]

@McDad
I have, most of the time, been able to use the ugly side of me for good. But it’s definitely there.

Understood. Harnessing our "less desirable " traits for good/productive efforts is better than not.

But I wouldn't want to see anyone in a relationship where one was toxic to the other even if the other was doing amazing things because of the toxicity (pressure, fear, guilt, etc).

Ideally we all deserve healthy relationships AND good efforts or outcomes. Those healthy relationships must include your relationship with yourself.

 

[Vjcvette]

Well,after thinking that I'd overcome my depression symptoms for the day at least,life threw me and my family a curveball at about 10:30 tonight. My families sweet little pomeranian Willow had a bit of a upset stomach the last few days, and had been eating grass a lot. Well,she continued to do it so they gave her some Pepto Bismol and she had thrown it up like she did the grass. We considered taking her to the vet Tommorow. Well,after hours of heavy panting,she crossed the rainbow Bridge laying in my step-dads lap tonight. We're all torn to pieces of course because we thought she was following us to NC because she was full of energy a couple of weeks ago.

She was 12 years old. I can take solace in knowing that she was loved and absolutely spoiled rotten. I also know that she isn't suffering any longer. Just keep my family in your prayers because they've been through a lot,and having a hard time selling their home now this. It's heartbreaking

I'll probably binge watch some TV most of the night and early morning until I fall asleep.

So sorry to hear about Willow, it is so hard because they are family but I know that she had a wonderful life.

 

[Vjcvette]

There are two Gentlemen that I know that need prayers.....Johnny who is in the Hospital and Raymond who needs a kidney and all of your prayers are appreciated.

 

[Pennheel]

So sorry to hear about Willow, it is so hard because they are family but I know that she had a wonderful life.

Thank you Losing her last night has reinforced in me the fact that as soon as I get moved in my new place,I'm getting me a new pooch. They're so therapeutic and a joy to have,and I miss that in a pet.

I will be praying for both of your requests