Recruiting Football Talk VII

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#73,700
#73,700
just bob said:
I like the stars and whatever as much as the next guy, but....... I'm old enough to know what I know and I'll leave it at that. ha
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Your user name fascinates me and has so many interesting possibilities for how it could be continued or have a great back story. I'm bored and kids aren't awake yet so I'll type out my long coffee fueled, lack of sleep thoughts from last minute shopping and wrapping presents all night. TL;DR


1. My personal favorite for the rest of your screen name:
just bob.....until I say stop or my body naturally informs you that your services are no longer needed

2. The fascinating back story behind your screen name:
A Tenneesseean homeowner in the year 2031 after multiple UT championships in all major sports is tired of giving the same "just Bob" response to visitors asking "Who is the guy next door that flies multiple UT flags, screams "Whoo" constantly between mumbling Rocky Top verses while out doing yard work in the nude (or occasionally wearing horrificly short cut-off jean shorts).

Bob has a small army of UT themed garden gnomes constantly being re-arranged in various (and often explicitly vulgar) positions showing them assaulting a remarkably accurate looking, life-sized statue of Nick Saban (who is smaller than every gnome). Replica, or maybe real, Nick Saban is also simultaneously screaming at, horse whipping and whining to a greedy looking statue of Greg Sankey attempting to defend Saban from the gnomes by swinging large sacks of money at them along with his small army of corrupt officials who throw flags a the UT garden gnomes. The homeowner in our story is also tired of explaining why "that's just Bob" has dozens of unpaid citations for running through the neighborhood's streets butt-naked multiple times in the previous 10 years and leaves nudez under the wipers of every car not in a garage.....but it's a progressive era and "just Bob" identifies as a Yeti and clothing is rarely worn among his kind. Our homeowner also suspects that "just Bob" goes by name of @Weezer on VN and may actually believe he is, as he refers himself when his loud warbling can be semi-understood, "Dolly's Llama".

The real tragedy in our story is that the homeowner is actually Rivers Cuomo, lead singer from the band Weezer, who just wanted to retire to a quiet community away from all the weirdos in Hollywood but now he completely regrets ever forming the legendary band because of his perveted, purple yeti neighbor.


3. Lastly, your screen name is half of the title of a movie called "Just Bob and Weave". The movie is an awful buddy cop comedy writen, directed, produced and starring Tyler Perry in the role of a cranky undercover narcotics detective named Bob. Bob is a week from retirement, his partner was recently tragically killed by a local hispanic drug kingpin named El Diablo and Bob blames himself because he jumped the gun and blew their cover after learning where the drugs and money are housed and then witnessing the murder of one of El Diablo's men who was suspected of being the rat. Bob thought they finally had enough to take down El Diablo but the local judge and half the police force was on El Diablo's payroll so the case got dismissed.

Bob just wants to get through his last week on the force without being killed so he sink into alcohol fueled depression and wait for a chance to to murder El Diablo. Instead, his chief, who is actually not corrupt, assigns him with training an up-and-coming undercover narcotics agent who graduated the academy with record high scores. She is a sassy black woman named Weave that is built like a linebacker........Weave is also played by Tyler Perry in a dual main co-starring role and Tyler also plays multiple side characters at a local hair salon that is a front for moving El Diablo's drugs.

The movie Is universally panned for its terrible acting and writing but does well enough at the box office to get multiple sequels where Bob has to keep getting pulled out of retirement and put up with Weave's constant verbal abuse but admittedly effective methods.

OK, I think that I a delirious enough to sneak in a nap until everyone else wakes up.....otherwise I might spend Christmas in a mental ward. Merry Christmas fellow Vol brothers and sisters.....and whatever the hell @Weezer is.
 
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