Jodie traded her next two shifts to come down and surprise me for my my birthday. Other than being embarrassed by four days of dirty dishes in the kitchen and a few of the magazines from my vintage Playboy collection laying around, it was great.
We went to Frankie’s Fun Park. I absolutely destroyed her in Putt Putt and Big Buck HD. She didn’t want to mess up her hair playing laser tag, so she just watched me. I recorded the highest score of anyone in three of the four games I played. I’m pretty sure she was impressed.
After dinner at Applebees, we went back to my place for some alone time. While I was cleaning up and getting the Xbox ready, she made me a sundae. Here’s where things get interesting. One of my friends brought me back weed gummies from Colorado last month. To get them through airport security, he put the weed gummies in a candy gummy container that I had sitting in my Kraft Dinner drawer.
Jodie didn’t know this and sprinkled gummies all over my sundae. I went to town on that #### thing. It wasn’t until my mouth started to get dry and my face felt flush that I realized what had happened. I should have gone all Karen Carpenter at that point, but figured “what’s the worst thing that could happen?” Boy oh boy, that was a mistake!
It didn’t take long until I thought I was having a heart attack and was afraid of a bear attacking me if I went out for some fresh air. After an hour of begging her to take me to the hospital, she walked me to my neighbors where they convinced me that the couch in his garage was a hospital bed.
Jodie won’t return my messages. I hope it’s because she’s working double shifts and not because she’s mad. If anyone has had a similar experience, how did you ask for forgiveness? CVS doesn’t have “sorry I got too high” cards. I already looked.
