James Harrison Returns Sons' Participation Trophies

#101
#101
crusse10 said:
A teachable moment would be to show his kids the Super Bowl rings he's won because of earning them and to tell them that, if you want to be like your dad and win these that everybody doesn't get, you gotta work hard and be the best. Then ask them if they want to keep these dumb things that everyone is given. Then the kids might say to throw them away.

Posting a rant on instagram about how your kids were given a participation award and that you're going to take them away is not teaching.

One way you start off with discussion and let them get to the same conclusion. The other way it starts with them being happy and ends with them feeling like they lost something.
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I don't know many 5-6 year old kids that read instagram, so I doubt his son read the rant. That aside, were you actually present when he took the participation awards, because if not, how do you know how he handled it?
 
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#102
#102
Weezer said:
I don't know many 5-6 year old kids that read instagram, so I doubt his son read the rant. That aside, were you actually present when he took the participation awards, because if not, how do you know how he handled it?
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Was he present when they got them?
 
#105
#105
He knew his kids were playing in a league that would inevitably give out trophies like this and he did nothing about it. One kid is 2 years older than the other, so there's a good chance he'd already played in that league before. No way the idea of these trophies was brand new unless he just never paid attention until they were sitting out.
 
#106
#106
This whole discussion is so tired. When I played soccer in elementary school back in the early to mid 80s every kid got a trophy but the top 3 teams got bigger ones. It was no big deal and everyone knew who finished 1st, 2nd, and 3rd. There was no detrimental effect of the kids that got so-called "participation trophy".
 
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#107
#107
crusse10 said:
He knew his kids were playing in a league that would inevitably give out trophies like this and he did nothing about it. One kid is 2 years older than the other, so there's a good chance he'd already played in that league before. No way the idea of these trophies was brand new unless he just never paid attention until they were sitting out.
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How many leagues don't hand out trophies?
 
#108
#108
we're talking about the same guy that didn't appreciate the participation award of White House trips, so he said no

at least we can guarantee that this isn't a new feeling on his part
 
#109
#109
burntorangeVOLffle said:
This whole discussion is so tired. When I played soccer in elementary school back in the early to mid 80s every kid got a trophy but the top 3 teams got bigger ones. It was no big deal and everyone knew who finished 1st, 2nd, and 3rd. There was no detrimental effect of the kids that got so-called "participation trophy".
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Nor would it have been "detrimental" if they didn't get a participation trophy at all...
 
#112
#112
Rasputin_Vol said:
Nor would it have been "detrimental" if they didn't get a participation trophy at all...
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If it's a wash, then why cause a scene and return the trophy?

It seems we should only be promoting this behavior if the trophy itself was truly detrimental
 
#113
#113
Rasputin_Vol said:
Nor would it have been "detrimental" if they didn't get a participation trophy at all...
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it's not detrimental to not be given one, even though positive reinforcement could push a kid to do something he doesn't necessarily love early on so that he starts to see the joy in it later

But hey, James Harrison doesn't care about that. If you're not a winner, you didn't earn anything. He'll still love you, as he said in his instagram post, but he doesn't want you feeling good about what you did.
 
#114
#114
crusse10 said:
He knew his kids were playing in a league that would inevitably give out trophies like this and he did nothing about it. One kid is 2 years older than the other, so there's a good chance he'd already played in that league before. No way the idea of these trophies was brand new unless he just never paid attention until they were sitting out.
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How do you know what he did or did not know?
 
#115
#115
Rasputin_Vol said:
Nor would it have been "detrimental" if they didn't get a participation trophy at all...
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I agree there is no real need for a trophy. I was on a first place team one year and a last place team another. Got trophies for both but placed no value on the latter.

However, I do find people that rail against the participation trophy to be overreacting alarmists.
 
#116
#116
burntorangeVOLffle said:
This whole discussion is so tired. When I played soccer in elementary school back in the early to mid 80s every kid got a trophy but the top 3 teams got bigger ones. It was no big deal and everyone knew who finished 1st, 2nd, and 3rd. There was no detrimental effect of the kids that got so-called "participation trophy".
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Being an old fart, I grew up participating in sports in the 60s, 70s and 80s. I never once got a participation trophy, and I didn't feel ripped off at all. We got a nice banquet at the end of the year and I wasn't too sure we even deserved that. One year, when I was very young, coach said 'If you win a trophy at the end of the year for first, second or third in the league, I will buy every one of you a steak dinner.' Screw the trophy was my thought, I wanted that steak dinner, but didn't get it. Oh well :)
 
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#117
#117
Weezer said:
How do you know what he did or did not know?
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I'm assuming that he knew his kids were in a youth sports league of some sort. I'm assuming that this isn't the first time his kids are in a sports league. I'm assuming this isn't the first year that his kids (at least the older) is in that league. Based on these assumptions (that frankly aren't all that much of a stretch), either this is the first time he publicly announced that he took away a participation trophy or he didn't know they (or at least the elder son) got one before.
 
#118
#118
crusse10 said:
So what does this fall under, then? Are you calling this a moral?
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I really don't understand why it even matters why the parent chooses to do something this trivial. It is a participation trophy. Not a scholarship. Not a job. Not something that actually means diddly-squat. But we're talking about a participation trophy.

Relax...
 
#119
#119
crusse10 said:
I'd be shocked if a league didn't hand out trophies at that age
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Then what choice did Harrison have then? You and I both know that most of them hand out trophies, yet you seem to call out is parenting skills by suggesting that he wasn't aware that "this particular league" gave out trophies... with the assumption being that he could have easily found a league that didn't hand them out.
 
#120
#120
Rasputin_Vol said:
Then what choice did Harrison have then? You and I both know that most of them hand out trophies, yet you seem to call out is parenting skills by suggesting that he wasn't aware that "this particular league" gave out trophies... with the assumption being that he could have easily found a league that didn't hand them out.
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He could just understand that small things like this change over time and that, regardless of the participation trophy for 6- and 8-year olds, it's still possible to them the difference between participating and winning.
 
#121
#121
Vol8188 said:
If it's a wash, then why cause a scene and return the trophy?

It seems we should only be promoting this behavior if the trophy itself was truly detrimental
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I can see that point also.

I guess it goes back to what I said earlier. It ain't the trophy, it's what consider important enough to hand out trophies for is where we have gone off the rails. We choose to celebrate games and celebrity and superficial nonsense instead of people who have a real skill or talent that can be a benefit to society.
 
#122
#122
MphsBlues said:
Being an old fart, I grew up participating in sports in the 60s, 70s and 80s. I never once got a participation trophy, and I didn't feel ripped off at all. We got a nice banquet at the end of the year and I wasn't too sure we even deserved that. One year, when I was very young, coach said 'If you win a trophy at the end of the year for first, second or third in the league, I will buy every one of you a steak dinner.' Screw the trophy was my thought, I wanted that steak dinner, but didn't get it. Oh well :)
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Participation trophies are more for little kids. My guess is under 10 years old. There comes a point when kids realize the difference between winning and losing and being first or last. Trophies have little bearing on that.

Some people act as if giving a 3-10 year old a small token to acknowledge their participation in a given year is equal to handing out Super Bowl rings for going 0-16.
 
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#123
#123
burntorangeVOLffle said:
Participation trophies are more for little kids. My guess is under 10 years old. There comes a point when kids realize the difference between winning and losing and being first or last. Trophies have little bearing on that.

Some people act as if giving a 3-10 year old a small token to acknowledge their participation in a given year is equal to handing out Super Bowl rings for going 0-16.
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Fair enough. I'm just a bit old school. :)
 
#124
#124
Vol8188 said:
The nomenclature is irrelevant. Call it what you want, but you are in someway upset about this.

So back to the question: do you really believe the size of the trophy is relevant? Bigger trophies lead to more entitled kids.
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I'm not upset about it. I was commenting that I agree with Harrison's view that participation trophies are dumb.

size addressed below

Vol8188 said:
Bigger trophies=more entitled kids.

Is that not what you just stated here? That only big trophies are the problem?
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It's clear you must have been awarded many participation trophies for critical thinking but no championship ones.

I responded on size since PJ said "little" trophies. The size is not the issue I was talking about.

Vol8188 said:
I'm more interested in hearing you guys defend the notion that participation trophies are ruining our nation.
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Honestly I can't even believe I'm replying to these straw man exaggerations. I never said they are ruining the nation.

I simply suggested the over emphasis on rewarding every little activity of a child with some symbolic notion of achievement could strengthen a sense of entitlement in a child.

All of this was in response to PJ suggesting Harrison's actions are negative for his kids - I was provided an argument why giving those awards could also have negative consequences.

For some reason you have to turn that into my being outraged and claiming participation trophies are ruining the country. Wow.
 
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