Marriage

If ever been married, have you had a marriage that ended in divorce?

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#802
#802
rocktopper16 said:
Been married three years to my Highschool crush been together since we was 15, Now 21 we've kinda grew old of one another. We don't go out like we used too. I'm usually outside tinkering on things and she does whatever she pleases. Not caring for one another Idk. It could be normal since we've been together this long, I'm still young and trying to figure life out.
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better start talking to her, if you want it to work
 
#804
#804
10-4. I wanted to do a cruise or take here on a island getaway but have no idea where to start.
 
#805
#805
rocktopper16 said:
10-4. I wanted to do a cruise or take here on a island getaway but have no idea where to start.
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No need to leave the house, Bro. Just rent a movie, throw a decent steak on the grill, turn off the cell phones, and talk to her...maybe rub her feet...tell her she/y'all are important to you and you are a little bit concerned about how things are going and that you just want to make sure y'all both know where you stand and where you're headed.

The little stuff that piles up and turns into big stuff is the killer. Honest communication is the key.

Good luck and GBO!
 
#806
#806
VolMax said:
No need to leave the house, Bro. Just rent a movie, throw a decent steak on the grill, turn off the cell phones, and talk to her...maybe rub her feet...tell her she/y'all are important to you and you are a little bit concerned about how things are going and that you just want to make sure y'all both know where you stand and where you're headed.

The little stuff that piles up and turns into big stuff is the killer. Honest communication is the key.

Good luck and GBO!
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good advice
 
#807
#807
VolMax said:
No need to leave the house, Bro. Just rent a movie, throw a decent steak on the grill, turn off the cell phones, and talk to her...maybe rub her feet...tell her she/y'all are important to you and you are a little bit concerned about how things are going and that you just want to make sure y'all both know where you stand and where you're headed.

The little stuff that piles up and turns into big stuff is the killer. Honest communication is the key.

Good luck and GBO!
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A good footrub will cure a lot of ills....I have a sign I stick up on my boat from time to time...”Footrubs available....inquire within”...
 
#809
#809
Married once, with our 20 year anniversary coming up this summer.

To the 21 year old above, I'm glad you're recognizing an issue before it's too late. There is nothing normal about a long term committed relationship. Normal is getting dull, not trying to save it, one or both of you wandering off followed by heartache. Commitment, including marriage, is special exactly because it ISN'T normal. If you care, and it sounds like you do, recognize that complacency is the enemy of your relationship, and fight for her. Treat her special (I didn't say spend a ton of money you don't have on her). Make memories together. Doesn't require a bank account, it's all I how you treat each other. Good luck bro.
 
#811
#811
PimpVol said:
Got a letter from his church explaining how much I tithed his church in the mail yesterday. Brings back good memories...
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that sucks...
was hoping it was working out for you. You hadn't posted in a while
How are your boys?
 
#817
#817
vol_in_ar said:
easier said than done
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I won't be tithing his church anymore. So he won't be mailing me anything else. But trying to erase the last 15 years of my life from head is a slow process.

One thing that I have found is love is not controllable. I still love my wife like I always have. I don't talk to her anymore (since July 31st), speak to her or see her. But that doesn't matter, I still feel the same way. Not sure how you go about not loving someone, but for me it hasn't worked. It probably will be awhile, if ever, before my love for her will die out on it's own.

But, my understanding of what went on is becoming clearer. This article describes what happened to her (and thus me), to a T.

Women's Infidelity

It's like a step by step tutorial of how things went. The explosive anger makes "perfect" sense now. I could not for the life of me figure out why the hell she was mad @ me (I was the one trying to save our family, why the hell was she mad @ me). But now I know she was mad @ herself (quite likely because her "boyfriend" screwed her a few times and then dumped her, among other things), and I was merely the outlet for her frustrations. I have long since quit blaming myself for her wrongdoings (though she apparently has not), and I clearly live a new, and different life. But it is by force, not of choice, and some part of my marriage creeps into my head at some point of every day.

As for now, all I'm doing is waiting for the dominoes to begin falling. We have 3 boys who will begin to ask questions sooner or later, if they haven't already. For right now (7 months in) her & her mom have a good coverup going on over on that side & all is well for them. But, she can't lie forever. The truth will force it's way to the surface soon enough.
 
#823
#823
Pretty clever idea...

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