Marriage

If ever been married, have you had a marriage that ended in divorce?

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#152
#152
There has never been a divorce in my family, I told my wife when we got married, "vows say until death do us apart". If you want out one of us gotta die.

20+ years of bliss and still counting.
 
#154
#154
I prolly screwed up the curve. Third time has been a charm for me and RV. 15 and counting.
 
#155
#155
On the one hand, those infidelity clauses scream trust issues. I've always thought if you don't trust the person, you shouldn't be in a relationship. And I've learned this lesson the hard way.

On the other hand... Some people are really good at deception. Maybe collecting a $5M bonus would help you get over your heartache :)
 
#156
#156
Thrasher865 said:
On the one hand, those infidelity clauses scream trust issues. I've always thought if you don't trust the person, you shouldn't be in a relationship. And I've learned this lesson the hard way.

On the other hand... Some people are really good at deception. Maybe collecting a $5M bonus would help you get over your heartache :)
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First two were pros at this. I had no clue. RV can't even tell a white lie without making a stoopid lie face. :birgits_giggle:
 
#157
#157
Thrasher865 said:
On the one hand, those infidelity clauses scream trust issues. I've always thought if you don't trust the person, you shouldn't be in a relationship. And I've learned this lesson the hard way.

On the other hand... Some people are really good at deception. Maybe collecting a $5M bonus would help you get over your heartache :)
Click to expand...

Requiring the other to maintain a certain weight, sex frequency, etc is ridiculous. At that point it would feel like obligation and not natural. You should do those things because you want to and because you enjoy being in the relationship.

5 million would def help but it doesn't make this contract any less strange. I can understand though people wanting to protect their assets like money and such but like you said that sort of seems like they aren't trusting to begin with.
 
#158
#158
Georgia Peach said:
Requiring the other to maintain a certain weight, sex frequency, etc is ridiculous. At that point it would feel like obligation and not natural. You should do those things because you want to and because you enjoy being in the relationship.

5 million would def help but it doesn't make this contract any less strange. I can understand though people wanting to protect their assets like money and such but like you said that sort of seems like they aren't trusting to begin with.
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It is not ridiculous at all. When one marries, they have certain expectations that their partner should/needs to fulfill. The "love contracts" merely put the traditional implicit expectations on paper in explicit terms. It isn't romantic in our culture but I don't think it is ridiculous either.
 
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#159
#159
PKT_VOL said:
It is not ridiculous at all. When one marries, they have certain expectations that their partner should/needs to fulfill. The "love contracts" merely put the traditional implicit expectations on paper in explicit terms. It isn't romantic in our culture but I don't think it is ridiculous either.
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Perhaps I am thinking purely in romantic terms. Forgive me I am a woman lol. I guess I can see the benefits just seems silly. "If you gain 50 pounds (or whatever) from a pregnancy and don't lose it by such and such time I can divorce you." Seems harsh.
 
#160
#160
Georgia Peach said:
Perhaps I am thinking purely in romantic terms. Forgive me I am a woman lol. I guess I can see the benefits just seems silly. "If you gain 50 pounds (or whatever) from a pregnancy and don't lose it by such and such time I can divorce you." Seems harsh.
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That happens all the time now, without a contract.
 
#161
#161
Georgia Peach said:
Perhaps I am thinking purely in romantic terms. Forgive me I am a woman lol. I guess I can see the benefits just seems silly. "If you gain 50 pounds (or whatever) from a pregnancy and don't lose it by such and such time I can divorce you." Seems harsh.
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Ha. Forgiven. Helps keep things in balance.

As to the 50 pounds after pregnancy, everyone has different expectations and breaking points. No two people have exactly the same standards or breaking point. I don't think pregnancy should be an excuse to let yourself go (for multiple reasons) but I am not sure how many pounds or how much time would be acceptable for me.
 
#162
#162
Georgia Peach said:
Perhaps I am thinking purely in romantic terms. Forgive me I am a woman lol. I guess I can see the benefits just seems silly. "If you gain 50 pounds (or whatever) from a pregnancy and don't lose it by such and such time I can divorce you." Seems harsh and really ****ing stupid.
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I elaborated a little, for you.
 
#163
#163
If you let yourself go beyond reason, your partner is not going to be attracted to you anymore. If he/she is no longer attracted to you, then the sex will stop. Sexless marriages are not happy marriages, and the marriage will most likely fail.

This is more than just the sex. Without physical attraction, the mental attraction (or love, if you will) will fade over time as well. It's only human, and nobody can be held at fault for feeling this way.

If you need a piece of paper to convince yourself to stay in reasonable shape for your partner, then you are not committed to the relationship.
 
#164
#164
Thrasher865 said:
If you let yourself go beyond reason, your partner is not going to be attracted to you anymore. If he/she is no longer attracted to you, then the sex will stop. Sexless marriages are not happy marriages, and the marriage will most likely fail.

This is more than just the sex. Without physical attraction, the mental attraction (or love, if you will) will fade over time as well. It's only human, and nobody can be held at fault for feeling this way.

If you need a piece of paper to convince yourself to stay in reasonable shape for your partner, then you are not committed to the relationship.
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This is also true.
 
#165
#165
Thrasher865 said:
If you let yourself go beyond reason, your partner is not going to be attracted to you anymore. If he/she is no longer attracted to you, then the sex will stop. Sexless marriages are not happy marriages, and the marriage will most likely fail.

This is more than just the sex. Without physical attraction, the mental attraction (or love, if you will) will fade over time as well. It's only human, and nobody can be held at fault for feeling this way.

If you need a piece of paper to convince yourself to stay in reasonable shape for your partner, then you are not committed to the relationship.
Click to expand...

Very true.

For those guys that complain about their wives weight after pregnancy, just remember. You put it there, you need to help her take it off or STFU.
 
#166
#166
Thrasher865 said:
If you let yourself go beyond reason, your partner is not going to be attracted to you anymore. If he/she is no longer attracted to you, then the sex will stop. Sexless marriages are not happy marriages, and the marriage will most likely fail.

This is more than just the sex. Without physical attraction, the mental attraction (or love, if you will) will fade over time as well. It's only human, and nobody can be held at fault for feeling this way.

If you need a piece of paper to convince yourself to stay in reasonable shape for your partner, then you are not committed to the relationship.
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Well obviously. I was just pointing out the exceptions. Also, an exception are marriages that involve asexual people. So that wouldn't be included in the contract. I guess just weight numbers and how many movies you have to cuddle to and watch per week...or something.

I would also say that needing the contract to stay in shape for your partner is silly mostly because you should be more concerned about being healthy for yourself.
 
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#167
#167
PKT_VOL said:
It is not ridiculous at all. When one marries, they have certain expectations that their partner should/needs to fulfill. The "love contracts" merely put the traditional implicit expectations on paper in explicit terms. It isn't romantic in our culture but I don't think it is ridiculous either.
Click to expand...

I'm not surprised at all that you would have this opinion.
Posted via VolNation Mobile
 
#169
#169
Georgia Peach said:
Well obviously. I was just pointing out the exceptions. Also, an exception are marriages that involve asexual people. So that wouldn't be included in the contract. I guess just weight numbers and how many movies you have to cuddle to and watch per week...or something.

I would also say that needing the contract to stay in shape for your partner is silly mostly because you should be more concerned about being healthy for yourself.
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In fairness, people are motivated by different things.
 
#171
#171
Georgia Peach said:
Perhaps I am thinking purely in romantic terms. Forgive me I am a woman lol. I guess I can see the benefits just seems silly. "If you gain 50 pounds (or whatever) from a pregnancy and don't lose it by such and such time I can divorce you." Seems harsh.
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Extremely harsh. I don't own a scale. Do not care what she weighs (within good health). I care what she does and who she is.

And of course, she wants a divorce. She says I have settled. I say I found what I want. She says I am happy with mediocrity. I say I am happy being in love with her & raising our boys. Impasse......
 
#172
#172
PimpVol said:
Extremely harsh. I don't own a scale. Do not care what she weighs (within good health). I care what she does and who she is.

And of course, she wants a divorce. She says I have settled. I say I found what I want. She says I am happy with mediocrity. I say I am happy being in love with her & raising our boys. Impasse......
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That doesn't make any sense. Gotta be more to it.
 
#174
#174
PKT_VOL said:
That doesn't make any sense. Gotta be more to it.
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Of course there is more to it. If only I knew.... As angry as she has been acting, something big has happened. I make virtually no headway with whatever the hell that is usually, and normally a frivolous argument ensues. Those are quite draining.
But the bottom line is we are currently fighting over nothing right now in my opinion. So that makes me feel like we still have another big fight coming whenever I figuge out what is REALLY wrong. This really sucks.
 
#175
#175
PimpVol said:
Of course there is more to it. If only I knew.... As angry as she has been acting, something big has happened. I make virtually no headway with whatever the hell that is usually, and normally a frivolous argument ensues. Those are quite draining.
But the bottom line is we are currently fighting over nothing right now in my opinion. So that makes me feel like we still have another big fight coming whenever I figuge out what is REALLY wrong. This really sucks.
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Hang tough. Don't let her frustrate you to the point of doing something stupid.
 
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