Marriage

If ever been married, have you had a marriage that ended in divorce?

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#178
#178
PimpVol said:
Of course there is more to it. If only I knew.... As angry as she has been acting, something big has happened. I make virtually no headway with whatever the hell that is usually, and normally a frivolous argument ensues. Those are quite draining.
But the bottom line is we are currently fighting over nothing right now in my opinion. So that makes me feel like we still have another big fight coming whenever I figuge out what is REALLY wrong. This really sucks.
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Wow. I feel for you.

I have never understood why couples (or a person in a relationship) feels like a relationship is one big poker game. One should never be holding their cards. It only makes it worse. Both sides should have all the cards on the table at all times.
 
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#179
#179
PKT_VOL said:
Wow. I feel for you.

I have never understood why couples (or a person in a relationship) feels like a relationship is one big poker game. One should never be holding their cards. It only makes it worse. Both sides should have all the cards on the table at all times.
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Good post
 
#180
#180
PKT_VOL said:
Wow. I feel for you.

I have never understood why couples (or a person in a relationship) feels like a relationship is one big poker game. One should never be holding their cards. It only makes it worse. Both sides should have all the cards on the table at all times.
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Your not married are you?
 
#181
#181
PKT_VOL said:
Wow. I feel for you.

I have never understood why couples (or a person in a relationship) feels like a relationship is one big poker game. One should never be holding their cards. It only makes it worse. Both sides should have all the cards on the table at all times.
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What is worse is she keeps on with "it can't be fixed" without giving me a chance to fix it. So since she has moved on in her head, I am supposed to abandon my wife and family, merely because she has. Ludicrous. She told me my boys don't need me in their life and that they would fine with me coming to visit periodically. Equally ludicrous. She has really turned my world upside-down. And left it there. My sense of self-worth & purpose is totally lost. I was perfectly fine being husband/father. I have no desire to live in some other place away from my family. Who all happen to be perfectly healthy, but not with me because she is not "happy". #WhiskyTangoFoxtrot
 
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#183
#183
PimpVol said:
What is worse is she keeps on with "it can't be fixed" without giving me a chance to fix it. So since she has moved on in her head, I am supposed to abandon my wife and family, merely because she has. Ludicrous. She told me my boys don't need me in their life and that they would fine with me coming to visit periodically. Equally ludicrous. She has really turned my world upside-down. And left it there. My sense of self-worth & purpose is totally lost. I was perfectly fine being husband/father. I have no desire to live in some other place away from my family. Who all happen to be perfectly healthy, but not with me because she is not "happy". #WhiskyTangoFoxtrot
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Sounds like she already has another man on the side, but wants you to call it off.
 
#184
#184
First thing I thought. Still feel that way. I think something happened that she does not think she can "live with" and still remain married (she has become CONSPICUOUSLY RELIGIOUS lately). Hardly a coincidence imo. There is nothing else that can't be fixed imo. So that is why she is coming with these bs reasons and excuses. She claims she hasn't, but nothing else makes sense. At all.
 
#185
#185
If it was something positive that happened, she would likely want to bring you into that or at least share the details with you.
 
#188
#188
PimpVol said:
How do you have time to develop another life while being totally commited and invested in your current life?
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I read somewhere that people have **** mixed up, basically. They think their first priority is their children and second is their marriage. However, this actually is a huge disservice to the family. When children become priority #1, then the spouse falls behind the plethora of activities the children are involved in.

On a second note, depending on each of your work schedules there are countless opportunities for her to spark a connection with someone else.
 
#189
#189
Clearly. There was "time" for me to spark something to. Just never had the need nor desire. Funny how that works... or doesn't.
 
#191
#191
wildnkrazykat said:
I read somewhere that people have **** mixed up, basically. They think their first priority is their children and second is their marriage. However, this actually is a huge disservice to the family. When children become priority #1, then the spouse falls behind the plethora of activities the children are involved in.
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Maintaining a house and raising three little boys leave plenty of time for dating and romance. What's pissing me off is that all of my effort and work is wasted. My life is uprooted and changed forever. I am now a child support victim and a visitation father all because of some bull****. I could have never started this whole deal if I knew it was based on such a flimsy ****ing premise.
 
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#194
#194
PimpVol said:
Maintaining a house and raising three little boys leave plenty of time for dating and romance. What's pissing me off is that all of my effort and work is wasted. My life is uprooted and changed forever. I am now a child support victim and a visitation father all because of some bull****. I could have never started this whole deal if I knew it was based on such a flimsy ****ing premise.
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You're not divorced yet, so not sure all that applies for now...
So instead of focusing on the worst case scenario, focus on staying married
as she served you or just told you she wants a divorce
 
#195
#195
Just said it. And **** has been terrible ever since she did. June 11 will make one month since she told me (my birthday was May 11).
 
#197
#197
PimpVol said:
Just said it. And **** has been terrible ever since she did. June 11 will make one month since she told me (my birthday was May 11).
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well the bright side is she hasn't moved to quickly, and you can still go to counseling and work it out
 
#198
#198
Been married for 10 years on Friday. 4 kids and 2 houses later, i still love her like i did 10 years ago.
 
#200
#200
I am thinking about killing myself. I don't have much to live for anymore. Our country is going to hell and a hand basket.
Thrasher865 said:
You're 31! It will still happen. Hang out with your married friends. They will hook you up. Don't get down on yourself. You need to learn to flirt wherever you go, and get some digits. I believe in you, brother!
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