Movie Lines That Always Make You Laugh

#51
#51
"What a time to fall off the wagon. Look at your eyes."
"What's wrong with my eyes?"
"Well, they're red, bloodshot."
"You ought to see 'em from my side."
- Cat Ballou

"He's taking the knife out of the cheese!!! Do you think he wants some cheese??"
- Arthur

"I'll be taking these Huggies and whatever cash you got."
- Raising Arizona
 
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#52
#52
Monty Python and the Holy Grail:

Sir Bedevere: What makes you think she's a witch?
Peasant: Well, she turned me into a newt!
Sir Bedevere: A newt?
Peasant: [meekly after a long pause] ... I got better.
Crowd: [shouts] Burn her anyway!
 
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#53
#53
"I don't know who you are, but you are about to get Chlamydia."
 
#56
#56
No one has quoted office space yet?

Bob and his meeting with the other Bobs. Discussing his "people skills".
 
#57
#57
"Wow, what a hole?!" ~ Home Alone 2

"When the **** did we get ice cream?!" ~ The Ringer
 
#60
#60
Biopsyman said:
All lines from Fletch
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Yes! But here are two of my favorites:

"You got a gun, creep?"
"Shamu's got one, borrow his."

"I'll have a bloody mary, a steak sandwich, and aaa steak sandwich, please."

Open Range

"How 'bout if I hold your head under water for just a little while."

Tombstone

"I know, let's have a spelling contest!"

Batman

"Never rub another man's rhubarb!"

Beverly Hills Cop

"Well, boss,I just thought..."
"Don't think, Axel! It makes my d1ck itch!"

"You're not gonna fall for the banana in the tailpipe? It should be more natural, brother. It should flow out, like this - "Look, man, I ain't fallin' for no banana in my tailpipe!" See, that's more natural for us. You been hanging out with this dude too long."

I'd post more if i weren't on mobile.
 
#64
#64
"Is that girl a boy too" followed by a 10 year old girl flipping the guy off- Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
 
#66
#66
[YouTube]http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yMiGHGsdikU[/YouTube]

"Now you are going to shoot me in my pinky toe"
 
#67
#67
The entire barrack scene in Full Metal Jacket.

Blazing Saddles-Excuse me while I whip this out.

Elf(mail room scene)- Reminds me of Santas workshop, only it smells like mushrooms and everyone here looks like they want to hurt me.
 
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#68
#68
WallyBalls said:
YES!

I die every time he says that. No idea why.
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They're arguing about the smell that's it's freedom other saying it's fish when really it's fish currently where they are freedom once out of the truck.

Way to go marv you broke out of prison to steal 14 cents from a Santa Clause.
 
#72
#72
WallyBalls said:
Watching Christmas Vacation this weekend gave me this idea.

I laugh every time Clark Griswold is asked "Where are you going to put a tree that big?" and he says "Bend over and I'll show you" and "I wasn't talking to you." I'll laugh every damn time.


So what lines crack you up?


I'll add Dom Delouise saying "It sounds like steam escaping..." during the French Mistake scene in Blazing Saddles.
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Thanks! I can't get the French Mistake scene out of my head now. :loco:
 
#74
#74
"I'm a 28 year old man, I can eat a chicken sandwich if I want"

"He's a 28 year old man and he can eat a chicken sandwich, very impressive. Mike Fitzgibbons son is a nuclear physicist and my son can eat a chicken sandwich!!!! Now you can eat that god**** roast beef or you can go to bed".

- Freddy Got Fingered

Edit: Also from that movie..

Dad makes fun of girl in wheelchair and she says

"Do you have a problem with my legs?"

He then replies, "no it looks like you have a problem with your legs"..

That gets me every time.
 
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