Rant -
Man, this really sucks.
No practice today. And no, film room and workouts don’t count. It’s not the same and everybody knows it. jmo.
Brian Rice said we’re back on the practice field Saturday and Sunday we’re in full pads – BUT NO MEDIA. What? How come not? What the heck is Fingers supposed to report on? This is utterly ridiculous. One might reasonably think (eye roll) we were working on some super-secret Manhattan Project. What? Are we planning to nuke all of our opponents this year? smh
Seriously. When you’re retired there’s not really a lot you have to do outside of football. Think of the children, won’t somebody? This day and age we live in. smh.
I guess I could go through our starting lineup one more time to see how things might be shaping up.
QB – A+ (I like all 3 of our QBs)
RB – B+ (I think Small is very good but if Sampson was ready to start this would be A+)
XWR – A+ (wistfully assumes Tillman comes back for one more year)
ZWR – B (Assumes Keyton gets the start at the beginning of the year)
Slot WR – B+ (I think Hyatt is really good; if he can learn to run like Calloway he’d be A+)
TE – B (Warren is maybe the most underrated TE in the conference)
LT – TBD (Do or die battle for this position and yielding is not an option. Whoever lives gets the nod)
LG – A+ (Jerome Carvin will be drafted next year if Cooper Mays can stay healthy this year)
OC – A- (Cooper says he’s stronger and should be able to stay healthy all year. He’ll get a bump if true)
RG – A (Spraggins is the most unheralded guy on our OL plus the story of him destroying the dark lord)
RT – A+ (first round draft pick next year unless Spyre convinces him to run it back one more time)
SDE – A+ (Finally our Baron has assumed the throne and will rule against our adversaries in all matters)
1T – A (Big O is stronger than an Abrams tank and will be far more destructive in battle this year)
3T – TBD (We’ve developed a Jason Bourne type for this spot. When ready, Bryson Eason is his name)
WDE – A+ (If Spyre is awash in funds we need this guy back next year. Make it happen Will)
MLB – A (This is our most dangerous weapon. Use with care as collateral damage may be unavoidable)
WLB – A- (Claimed to be notorious. Ruthless doesn’t begin to describe his ferocity)
NB – TBD (Our last guy here went to heaven. All heroes go to heaven. We’re looking for a new hero)
LCB – TBD (If Kid Charlemagne gets this spot I call dibs on printing the t-shirts)
RCB – B (A case of age discrimination but in business older people value experience above all else)
SS – B (Ditto to the age discrimination but this may work out as modifications have been made)
FS – A- (The guy is the leader of the unit. We live or die with him. It’s just the way it is)
P – A+ (In the 1980 Superman movie Clark punts a football into orbit. I watch Paxton and I’m reminded)
PK – A+ (Will one day have his own TV show. Chase McGrath, Private Eye. Good guys always win)
KO – A- (My argument is when Toby gets it through the uprights he should get the 3 points)
PR – TBD (Here hands are more important than feet. See Velus Jones vs Ole Miss last year)
KR – TBD (We will win the TV ratings as many tens of millions tune in to catch a glimpse of our flying squirrel)