Who in here married a woman or knows someone who married a woman who’s sole purpose was to have a child and never work again?

So what works for you and your wife is the “best setup “? Isn’t that a bit presumptuous of you to think everyone else should like whatever you like?

My wife stayed home with our children until last one was close to starting school. Wife went back to school and got a masters degree to qualify for a job she became interested in. My family was very happy with that arrangement but I don’t begin to think everyone else should do the same

Jesusucristo, don't be so insecure.
 
I will offer to any stay at home wife to trade jobs with me for one day. I’ll give her all the advise and instructions she needs to to the job while I ask for zero advice sitting at home all day doing laundry or vacuuming for an hour or two then sit on my ass for 8 hours while the kids in school. Not a single parent will trade with me. Why is that?
 
I’m quite secure….your the one who set the standard by which all Americans should aspire to raise their children. Seems to me your too ignorant to realize what you write here.

I never meant for anybody to take offense. All I said was that I had the best setup. I don't remember saying it's best for everybody or even telling others they should do it this way.

Don't be so sensitive. Don't be looking for reasons to be offended. You'll be happier.
 
I never meant for anybody to take offense. All I said was that I had the best setup. I don't remember saying it's best for everybody or even telling others they should do it this way.

Don't be so sensitive. Don't be looking for reasons to be offended. You'll be happier.
You should probably stop talking now. Whatever you’ve tried to convey failed. Don’t be so sensitive about it. Don’t look for reasons to be offended either. You’ll be happier. Run along now.
 
I get along with my soon-to-be ex-wife better now that we've separated and split the assets than any time in the last 5+ years.
 
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Never tell another man how to drink his whiskey or live his life.

Has she got him chained to the bed? Does he have two legs he can walk with?

If he's able, he can pour his own drinks and walk away from his own problems. If he doesn't, it is not on her....... it's on him.
He is going to get r*ped in divorce court if he leaves.
 
He is going to get r*ped in divorce court if he leaves.
He's going to be miserable AND teach his children that marriage sucks if he doesn't leave.

That's the rub. The kids are learning from the resentment, bickering, and coldness of their parent's bad marriage that marriage is dysfunctional.

If you love your kids, either fix your marriage so it functions and demonstrates a healthy model for them or get out of it. You'll only screw them up if they are raised to believe marriages are as bad as your lousy one.
 
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He's going to be miserable AND teach his children that marriage sucks if he doesn't leave.

That's the rub. The kids are learning from the resentment, bickering, and coldness of their parent's bad marriage that marriage is dysfunctional.

If you love your kids, either fix your marriage so it functions and demonstrates a healthy model for them or get out of it. You'll only screw them up if they are raised to believe marriages are as bad as your lousy one.
It always amazes me that two people will grow fat, spend money and become selfish enough to get a divorce, then as soon as it's final they'll lose weight, move into a smaller place they can afford and watch their pennies and be unselfish in their dating life to woo someone...... do they realize if they put the same sacrifices and effort into their current marriage they could put a lot of lawyers out of business? The no-fault divorce is one of the great downfalls of America.
 
Very true. You don’t win a prize for being ugly. I’m amazed really how easy it is to lose everything in this life except eating, and it takes that much from you, but few people say no to it.

Good idea to love the one you’re with. Or it’s cheaper to keep her.
 
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It always amazes me that two people will grow fat, spend money and become selfish enough to get a divorce, then as soon as it's final they'll lose weight, move into a smaller place they can afford and watch their pennies and be unselfish in their dating life to woo someone...... do they realize if they put the same sacrifices and effort into their current marriage they could put a lot of lawyers out of business? The no-fault divorce is one of the great downfalls of America.
One of the great ironies of politics is that the idea of codifying no-fault divorce into law was championed and first signed into law by Ronald Reagan when he was governor of California.
 
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It ain't the 1950s anymore. If you want your kid to have a nice life, in most cases both parents need to be working. Knowing this though, that's a main issue with this country still. 40 hour work weeks were made around the 1950s style where just the man would usually hold onto a job while the woman took care of the kids/house. Now with both working 40 hour work weeks, and having kids and a house to look after, it's too much on people. Either wages have to go up for stay at home moms to be stay at home moms legitimately, or full time pay needs to be more like 24 hour work weeks.
 
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It ain't the 1950s anymore. If you want your kid to have a nice life, in most cases both parents need to be working. Knowing this though, that's a main issue with this country still. 40 hour work weeks were made around the 1950s style where just the man would usually hold onto a job while the woman took care of the kids/house. Now with both working 40 hour work weeks, and having kids and a house to look after, it's too much on people. Either wages have to go up for stay at home moms to be stay at home moms legitimately, or full time pay needs to be more like 24 hour work weeks.
You're right, in the 50's they were much more financially constrained. I understand it might not make sense for a mom to stay at home once all the children are in school but prior to that daycare cost typically make sense for the lower income parent to stay home. If there were more stay at home moms, that were helping in schools I'm guessing there would not be the garbage spread in classes today.
 

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