Kansas fan makes fun of Pat's condition

#52
#52
Volosaurus rex said:
As the primary care provider for my mother (6 years now), who is in the terminal stages of Alzheimer's, I can tell you that there is nothing--absolutely, positively nothing--funny about this condition. It robs a person of his/her dignity and identity and it ultimately becomes much harder for the care provider than it is for the patient. Joking about Alzheimer's is unconscionable. If I am in a situation where some modicum of diplomacy must be exercised in expressing hostility, I am now inclined to say, "I hope that you develop Alzheimer's or worse, yet, that you become the primary care provider for an Alzheimer's patient." It is an extraordinarily cruel disease.
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I am also a primary care provider for someone with Alzheimer's (for nine years) and agree with you completely! In fact, God bless you for your love and patience. Frankly, I feel like I lost my mother about five years ago and the woman I look at today is not the mother I know and love.

With all that said, I still try to find some humor in my care giving! If she says or does something funny I laugh! Maybe I do this for my mental health but I try to find humor when I deal with such a cruel disease. Again, I am not laughing at ANYONE with such a terrible condition. Please don't judge me negatively for laughing at certain things my mother may do or say. No disrespect intended but I think I LOVE my mother much like other people do, maybe more. Again, God bless you for what you do!
 
#53
#53
vollygirl said:
Then why say it? You don't see the disrespect?

Dan (can I call you Dan?), I understand we all find humor in tasteless comments sometimes. And we all find humor or laugh at inappropriate things at inappropriate times.

But we are talking about one of the greatest coaches in the history of college athletics. And she's ours. She is Pat Summitt. And it's not okay to laugh or make light of her illness.
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JoseDaMofo said:
Nonsense. "Making light" of an illness is perfectly natural and frequently occurs among those who must deal with its effects on family or friends. For someone simply to find humor in it isn't wrong -- especially when they're conscious of the gravity and seriousness of the condition.

To admit to partaking in finding humor at inappropriate things and then scold somebody else for doing it is hypocritical.
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vollygirl said:
We're talking about Pat Summitt. I hold conversations regarding her to a higher standard. Perhaps that's my problem. I suppose it is. But I'm ok with that.


You don't deserve bashing. You just need to take a deep breath and realize you shouldn't feel humor at the misfortune of Coach Pat Summitt.


You're wrong. It isn't a light illness. And it's not a joke.
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So it's okay to laugh at Joe Schmo even if it's inappropriate, but not Pat? Interesting. :question:
 
#54
#54
What's sickening in this thread is the holier than thou egos running rampant. It's a freaking message board and people are trying to convey their opinions, whether you think it's right or wrong.
 
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#55
#55
chattavfl86 said:
Fair enough. Just being honest though. I guarantee there is more than one person who saw it and laughed a little. They are just smart enough not to post that they did. So why did I, I wonder? Probably because I know it was wrong of me to chuckle so I put myself out there for a little ridicule.
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Your problem is that you did not put on a false appearance of virtue. Perhaps you felt it was ok to confess your reaction here. After all, the same statement directed against a hated opponent's coach would have been received with praise and agreement. Just look back at past posts to see much worse said about our foes. In summary, what you said was criticized only because it involved one of our own. So, in fact, you stand on higher moral ground than the rest of us, particularly those who condemn you.
 
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#57
#57
Regarding potential coaches for a coaching search.

Sayers wrote: Part of the job is to forget you live in central Missouri.
pat-summitt.png
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This is what all the fuss is about?

Lulz, c'mon guys this is blown way out of proportion. It was a simple joke. I mean really?
 
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#58
#58
Dudleys87 said:
Anyone who makes fun of Pat should be kicked in the dick and upon trying to get back up kicked in the dick again.[/QUOTE

That would be too small a target on anyone who would make fun of a person afflicted with Alzheimer's
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#61
#61
GoVols15 said:
I am also a primary care provider for someone with Alzheimer's (for nine years) and agree with you completely! In fact, God bless you for your love and patience. Frankly, I feel like I lost my mother about five years ago and the woman I look at today is not the mother I know and love.

With all that said, I still try to find some humor in my care giving! If she says or does something funny I laugh! Maybe I do this for my mental health but I try to find humor when I deal with such a cruel disease. Again, I am not laughing at ANYONE with such a terrible condition. Please don't judge me negatively for laughing at certain things my mother may do or say. No disrespect intended but I think I LOVE my mother much like other people do, maybe more. Again, God bless you for what you do!
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If you can find laughter in your mother's behavior, it probably is a better coping mechanism. In terms of emotional resilience/flexibility, I have always described myself as more like an oak than a willow. My running "joke" is that, if a neurologist were to do a total-body scan of every fiber of my being, he/she wouldn't find one unfrayed nerve or one full measure of patience left.

Although we haven't commented on it directly, the thing that people who have never dealt with this disease before should understand is that Alzheimer's does far more than rob a person of his/her memory. Loss of cognition is actually far less noticeable or shocking than the radical transformation in personality which occurs over the course of time.
 
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#62
#62
The world is full of people who make inappropriate remarks and/or jokes. The faster you ignore the comment, the faster it disappears.
 
#64
#64
I'm gonna pretext this post by saying my father died earlier this year from pancreatic cancer. He said in his last days it was the most miserable experience of his life, and if he could go back and do it over he would have turned down all treatments and died quickly in his bed than slowly and painfully. I think watching that happen (and hearing his first hand accounts) gives me a decent soap box to preach off of.

He was originally diagnosed a year ago. went through surgery and treatments, and was told he'd be good, then a few weeks later he was rediagnosed and he died three months later. The day he was re diagnosed. he waited until my mother fell asleep and called me and the first two things he said were "Damn it to hell, the first time TN football is gonna be good in years and I'm gonna miss it." and he immediately followed it up with "And I won't get to see if those ****ing mayans were right or not either."

In the face of 100% confirmed death. He was making jokes.

We bought him a new tree stand (avid hunters in our whole family) and he got to use it once (killed a 6 point too, while on chemo). First thing he said about it?

"You make sure your mother doesn't get married for a few years. I don't want some other jerk killing deer out of my stand until you get a few."

He went to chemo one day that I took him, and one of the nurses was new. She missed his vein six times trying to get the needles in. And they hurt (especially when you've lost 70 pounds or so). They finally called the head nurse over and she got it on the first try. He looked at her, smiled and said, "Don't worry, it wasn't so bad. I grew up in the 70's." and the head nurse laughed because the new one didn't get the joke.

My mother swears to this day that when he died, he had a smile on his face. (I was taking finals and wasn't there because he threatened to haunt my ass if I left school).

I hope this has gotten through a bit, but, in case it hasn't I'll say it bluntly. Most people can't deal with death or tragedy. They have to find a way to cope. Drugs, alcohol, women, sports, fantasy, or often comedy. The best comedy comes from the saddest moments. Richard pryor's best standup routine happened describing how he set himself on fire trying to smoke crack. He took terror and tragedy and turned it into something to make tons of people feel better.

I understand you guys see it as disrespect to joke about an illness, but I disagree. Even mean spirited comedy is still a form of coping for something else and an exercising of the first amendment. To berate someone for finding something funny (and the joke was worth a chuckle honestly) because it offends "you" (especially if nobody you know has the problem) is one of the must un American things you can do. We have bigger things to hate each other for. At least make it something worth fighting over.
 
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#65
#65
This is for the poster that wished Alzheimers on someone. Classy. I hope you get AIDS. This person (no matter how poor of taste) has the right to say what they want. I seriously doubt that he/she is happy about Pat's situation. My grandmother just passed away. She suffered from this disease. She didn't know me for the last 5 years of her life. She will not have a basketball court named after her. She did not receive a million dollar paycheck to do nothing. She did not receive treatments at the mayo clinic. My other grandmother died of cancer. I could come up with a list of people that I care about that have died tragically in the last few years. Honestly, who gets to go out on their own terms? Have a sense of humor. If you can't understand that people often make light of life to deal with it's often difficult circumstances, then you can kill yourself. Then someone that cares about you can come on here and whine about the seriousness of suicide jokes. By the way, did you hear about David Carradine? Just playing!:peace2:
 
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#67
#67
TNRitz said:
As having my Grandfather pass away from Alzheimer's, to see ANYONE make fun of this horrible disease is heartbreaking! This is the most horrible disease anyone can face, and I sympathize with any family having to go through it! It is sad that we, as a society, can only seem to find joy in the misfortune of others! It was flat out wrong for them to poke fun of Pat, and wrong for anyone to see the humor in it! Yes, I may be taking this a bit personal, but I stand behind my view of the situation!
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I would argue that seeing a child's youth stolen and then being warped by the treatments for cancer is worse...
 
#68
#68
thehardknoxlife said:
Regarding potential coaches for a coaching search.

This is what all the fuss is about?

Lulz, c'mon guys this is blown way out of proportion. It was a simple joke. I mean really?
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Appears to me the insult was directed at Missouri. Some folks and reading comprehension are not the best of friends.
 
#69
#69
I don't really see the purpose in trying to get a cheap laugh at someone who is suffering from such a debilitating disease. I hope that the person on the Kansas board that tried so hard to get some much needed attention never has to deal with the loss of a loved one from Alzheimer's. Unfortunately for the poster, those who tend to make light of other people's suffering tend to have life changing experiences later down the road.

Besides that, it's just lowbrow, Busch league humor for other simpletons to laugh at. Nothing more.
 
#70
#70
mdrew27 said:
This is rediculous. People make fun of people all the time. No point of wasting your time discussing. Just ignore.
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Not in my nature to ignore such a situation. Wasn't raised that way. Make fun of, or pick on,a helpless person in my presence and it probably won't end well for you. Old school country values.
 
#71
#71
vollygirl said:
Your post makes me wanna throw up a little. I know that makes me sensitive, but I wanna throw up at the disrespect.
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Yeah, that's something you and the OP are just going to have to get over. People make fun of stuff. If it bothers you that much, it's your own fault.
 
#72
#72
I am a die hard Kansas Basketball Fan and LOVE Pat Summit. Do not judge people because of one idiot. Scan thru our volnation and you can find many on here too....just saying....Go Vols!!!!!
 
#75
#75
Volosaurus rex said:
If you can find laughter in your mother's behavior, it probably is a better coping mechanism. In terms of emotional resilience/flexibility, I have always described myself as more like an oak than a willow. My running "joke" is that, if a neurologist were to do a total-body scan of every fiber of my being, he/she wouldn't find one unfrayed nerve or one full measure of patience left.

Although we haven't commented on it directly, the thing that people who have never dealt with this disease before should understand is that Alzheimer's does far more than rob a person of his/her memory. Loss of cognition is actually far less noticeable or shocking than the radical transformation in personality which occurs over the course of time.
Click to expand...
You are correct my friend! My mother and others have had their dignity taken away and it is cruel beyond words. I just try to "keep on the positive side" as much as I can. I remember when Ronald Reagan (paraphrasing) said on his condition that the good thing is he will make new friends everyday. What an example of optimism. I also think Pat is another fine example for us to look up to! A lady of true class! Just remember through it all God walks with us!
 
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