Official Jon Gruden Thread XLVII

Status
Not open for further replies.
#3,155
#3,155
CS_VFL_7 said:
*request*

rudolph the red nose reindeer -

with all of JG's staff rather than Vixen, Dasher, Donner and Blitzen
Click to expand...

Johnny the red nosed ball coach, used to drink Jack Daniels all day,

Won him a title in pittsburgh, then he came back where he'd played.

most of his better players, used to love to sniff white dust

damn nearly every one, was drafted and became a bust
built a solid program, then he had a heart attack
while he was in recovery, Phil stabbed him in the back!

Chorus:
then one foggy winter's eve, Hamilton came to say, "Fulmer you're too old and fat, Kiffin knows just where it's at"

Kiffin, he split for Cali, leaving the hill in despair.
damn near a decade later we're praying for some bowl-cut hair!!!!!!!

Go vols!! Gruden to the hill!!!!! Ruger to my place
 
  • Like
Reactions: 8 people
#3,156
#3,156
Since this is the Gruden thread, Gruden comes, Tee as OC and Assistant HC and when Gus leaves AU for ArK, Steele as DC....
 
  • Like
Reactions: 4 people
#3,160
#3,160
Deerhunter47 said:
Johnny the red nosed ball coach, used to drink Jack Daniels all day,

Won him a title in pittsburgh, then he came back where he'd played.

most of his better players, used to love to sniff white dust

damn nearly every one, was drafted and became a bust
built a solid program, then he had a heart attack
while he was in recovery, Phil stabbed him in the back!

Chorus:
then one foggy winter's eve, Hamilton came to say, "Fulmer you're too old and fat, Kiffin knows just where it's at"

Kiffin, he split for Cali, leaving the hill in despair.
damn near a decade later we're praying for some bowl-cut hair!!!!!!!

Go vols!! Gruden to the hill!!!!! Ruger to my place
Click to expand...

Beav, you've got some competition for favorite insider here.
 
  • Like
Reactions: 2 people
#3,173
#3,173
buckfama said:
Get a load of this.

My aunt (hate to admit she is blood but she is) married this guy named Stoney. His brothers name was Rockey. Haha setuously.

Anyway, Stoney was driving home and hit a doe with his car. It was an old Cadillac and built like a tank. Didn't hurt the car but it killed the doe, he thought it did anyway.

So not one to waste good venison, Stoney drags this doe and puts her in the back seat of his Caddy. He can't put her in the trunk because it's full of firewood.

Starts driving down the road and hears a noise from the back seat. Looks in his rear view mirror and this doe is staring back at him.

So he pulls over and tries to figure out what do do about it. He does know she has a broken leg so he decides that the best course of action is to put her out of her misery.

He doesn't have a gun but he does have some firewood in the trunk. He figures he can bonk her in the head, knock her out and then pull her out and finish the job with his pocket knife. That way he won't get blood all in his car.

Sounded good in theory but poor execution did him in.

Gets his firewood and tries to bonk her in the head. She keeps ducking and he keeps missing. He then decides to get back there with her and hold her down and do it.

That was his biggest mistake of the day.

That doe beat the ever living hell out of him.

He had a black eye, bloody nose, busted lip, and assorted scrapes and bruises.

I will give him props, he did finish the job but it was more in self defense than anything.

He pulls into my grandmother's house and gets out looking like he just went through a crypts initiation.

When he told me and showed me the doe, I laughed for 10 minutes straight.

Top 3 funniest thing I ever heard of.
Click to expand...

Wow, that is awesome! Great story :D
 
  • Like
Reactions: 1 person
New posts
Status
Not open for further replies.

VN Store



Back
Top