Parents With Little Screaming Kids

#351
#351
Coug said:
I'm not sure if you're just a completely irrational person or you're just trolling. You claim to not be on the hoodrats side but then you turn around and say the white chic got what she deserved. You're constantly contradicting yourself.
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I haven't said the girl deserved it yet. Not one time. Maybe that's why you are confused. Post where I said that, or go somewhere else with the bs.
The thread is quiet outside of a couple of you that still don't get the point. Read other posts that understand and maybe you will as well.
that's typical vn though. Argue over something that's not even being posted.
My point has been the same since the beginning and hasn't changed, the dozen times I have posted it.
 
#352
#352
Spartacavolus said:
I haven't said the girl deserved it yet. Not one time. Maybe that's why you are confused. Post where I said that, or go somewhere else with the bs.
The thread is quiet outside of a couple of you that still don't get the point. Read other posts that understand and maybe you will as well.
that's typical vn though. Argue over something that's not even being posted.
My point has been the same since the beginning and hasn't changed, the dozen times I have posted it.
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Post #320, I quoted several of your posts and bolded certain sections. Read it and you'll understand why it certainly seems like you're saying she deserved it.

Nothing you have said has gone over my head. I get what you're saying, I just don't agree with it. If for whatever reason that makes you feel like you are somehow on a higher level of intelligence, so be it. I don't make excuses for idiocy so I'm not going to agree that it's somehow the lady's fault the mom felt the desire to elevate things to a physical nature. Doesn't matter what was said. The mother is an adult capable of walking away. She chose not to go that route.
 
#355
#355
Spartacavolus said:
why do a few of you have difficulty understanding that not all people will react the way you mention? The mom has been called a hoodrat and uncivilized animal by some here, yet she's expected to act like you would after a verbal assault in front of her kid in an obviously already tense situation?
You are focused on the wrong thing. I didn't ever say it was right or just that she was attacked or that I would act the way the mom did. I'd never fight in front of a kid unless it was a necessity to defend us. I simply have said when you open that door, don't be surprised if the other person shoves it open and violence ensues. Violence has no chance in that situation if someone doesn't run their mouth. Period.
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While I've taken a different view about what I would personally do, the fact is you are right that not everyone can be expected to react the same way as I would. My wife has students and my kids have classmates that decided not to fight when they were challenged and were applauded by their teachers for their self control. Then, when they got home, they were beat by their moms for not standing up for themselves. There is a different view in some communities about what to do in these situations. But, I would submit that most of the posters in this forum don't live in those communities.
 
#356
#356
Weezer said:
I'd turn it into an object lesson on what idiocy is, and what it looks like. Now, if the other guy throws the first punch, I'll defend myself, but I become the idiot if I escalate it to a physical nature.
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You are already escalating TOWARD a physical confrontation when you insult someone in the first place. It may diffuse and everyone go their way. Or you pissed them off to the point they will ***** slap you. You may INTEND to walk away and set an example, as we should. They may SEE TO IT you don't. You become an idiot the minute you help create and perpetuate the unpredictable situation.
 
#357
#357
YorkVol said:
While I've taken a different view about what I would personally do, the fact is you are right that not everyone can be expected to react the same way as I would. My wife has students and my kids have classmates that decided not to fight when they were challenged and were applauded by their teachers for their self control. Then, when they got home, they were beat by their moms for not standing up for themselves. There is a different view in some communities about what to do in these situations. But, I would submit that most of the posters in this forum don't live in those communities.
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I would still applaud that student for knowing better even though the mom that beat them didn't. I was always taught it takes a man, and one far more intelligent, to know how not to fight and accomplish the same end result.
 
#358
#358
GVF said:
You are already escalating TOWARD a physical confrontation when you insult someone in the first place. It may diffuse and everyone go their way. Or you pissed them off to the point they will ***** slap you. You may INTEND to walk away and set an example, as we should. They may SEE TO IT you don't. You become an idiot the minute you help create and perpetuate the unpredictable situation.
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Reread the hypothetical he posted. It's a different scenario than the one we've been discussing as it has the aggression being one-sided before being given a choice of action.
 
#359
#359
GVF said:
I would still applaud that student for knowing better even though the mom that beat them didn't. I was always taught it takes a man, and one far more intelligent, to know how not to fight and accomplish the same end result.
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I'm with you and I see a lot of adults in schools, churches and communities trying to push those same values. It is difficult to counter what they may be getting at home.
 
#360
#360
Spartacavolus said:
Good freaking gracious, how is it not clear. You run your mouth to somebody, especially about their kid, and especially verbally assaulting a parent in front of a child, you open the door. It's not that damned difficult to understand. And the mouthier a person, the less I care what the reaction is from the person on the other end.
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So, what should be the ultimate lesson learned in all of this?

You say that running your mouth at someone opens the door to a possible response that may end in violence. You are not condoing the violence, but you seem to be indicating that there is cause and effect. If you don't do X, then Y may not happen. Is this what I am understanding your position to be? Because if it is, then I can expand that line of thinking out to other situations and we will see if your stance remains this consistent.
 
#361
#361
Spartacavolus said:
And never have I posted that she should have been. Simply that it was in the girl's hands to control the situation, but instead she decided to tell a mom to go to hell. When you open a door for an idiot to create a worse situation, that's on you. It's called personal accountability, and nobody wants to claim it anymore. They want to blame it on the "uncivilized animal", or "hoodrat", but want no responsibility for causing the problem, while expecting and uneducated idiot to act responsibly.
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Now, you guys are reading this, right?
 
#362
#362
Spartacavolus said:
this is over your head, so go to another thread. If you don't understand that people react differently to situations, that's your problem borne of stupidity or naivety or both. Or again, go run your mouth to @ a dozen people today and get your ass kicked, then come back here and whine about how it wasn't fair.
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Sparty is beginning to turn me to his side. He's making sense.
 
#364
#364
YorkVol said:
While I've taken a different view about what I would personally do, the fact is you are right that not everyone can be expected to react the same way as I would. My wife has students and my kids have classmates that decided not to fight when they were challenged and were applauded by their teachers for their self control. Then, when they got home, they were beat by their moms for not standing up for themselves. There is a different view in some communities about what to do in these situations. But, I would submit that most of the posters in this forum don't live in those communities.
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Exactly. And the two posters all over me about this don't have kids, have not been around kids, and are flat out naive outside their bubble that says it's ok to tell a mother to go to hell and that they should be shown respect in return for voicing their dumbass opinion.
 
#366
#366
Spartacavolus said:
1 in 13 kids is on a psychiatric drug. Outrageous #'s.

And yes cdw, we do live differently. I think whomever butts into a mom's business with her child in a checkup line is a dumbass. You may think it's acceptable. I disagree. Maybe you will find out the hard way one day. I'm not at risk for that.
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See... I was being generous by saying 1 out of 10. You just said 1 out of 13. Again, no where near half or the majority.
 
#367
#367
Spartacavolus said:
Do you disagree?
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I see what you are saying. On the one hand, words should not lead to violence. On the other hand, we have to be aware that most people will react emotionally or irrationally when over wrods said to them.

My question to you would be, if you had to make a PSA about this situation (or any others similar to it), what would be the message you would want to send?
 
#369
#369
Rasputin_Vol said:
I see what you are saying. On the one hand, words should not lead to violence. On the other hand, we have to be aware that most people will react emotionally or irrationally when over wrods said to them.

My question to you would be, if you had to make a PSA about this situation (or any others similar to it), what would be the message you would want to send?
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Keep your mouth shut in situations like that unless it's a necessity to say or do something. There are 100 other ways to handle it.
 
#371
#371
utvolpj said:
Way to avoid the biggest error in your post. Kids acting up is not because the overwhelming majority have bad parents
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True. The biggest contributing factor, imo, is simply bad timing. In most cases the parent tried to get something done and the kids got bored/tired/hungry/wet and the parent wasn't able to get through before they melted down. Sometimes it is the parent's fault, if they took too long or didn't plan ahead. Sometimes it is no ones fault, the parent had to hit the store to get milk and bread or whatever and there wasn't anyone to watch them and it just became a bad situation.

So, if you don't know what is driving the situation, and, if you can't ignore it happily and feel inclined to get involved, be nice. Have some sympathy, be helpful, be a good neighbor etc. A confrontation is the last thing anyone needs at that point and it will only make things worse.

Kind of goes back to that old adage, if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.
 
#372
#372
g8terh8ter_eric said:
Regardless of if she could have handled it better, if she would have kept her mouth shut and let well enough alone, the situation would have never presented itself to either party. If you don't know what kind of day someone else is having, don't say a word about their kid being loud, as you may be tearing down the last shred of patience they have down. You can't run your mouth, and then play victim when someone whoops your ass.
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When she goes to court
You will find out how wrong your assumption is
 
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#373
#373
utvolpj said:
Way to avoid the biggest error in your post. Kids acting up is not because the overwhelming majority have bad parents
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If the parents are not making any move to correct the problem and the kid is not on any medication or has any special issues, then it is bad parenting.
 
#374
#374
Spartacavolus said:
Exactly. And the two posters all over me about this don't have kids, have not been around kids, and are flat out naive outside their bubble that says it's ok to tell a mother to go to hell and that they should be shown respect in return for voicing their dumbass opinion.
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I don't have kids. I've been around many of them. I helped my sister raise her three. I babysit my niece's five. I've pulled the all-night, no sleep shift with a sick baby that just wants to cry and felt helpless because nothing I could do could help. I've been grocery shopping with kids in tow and had them misbehave. From just born to now adult, I've been around kids. Through highs and lows, through good times and bad, I've been around kids. So even though I don't have kids of my own, I do have experience.

But I assume this post wasn't about me since I've never said it was okay to tell the mom to go to hell. I've consistently said it was wrong, but it wasn't deserving of an ass-whoopin'.
 
#375
#375
I have 3 kids and they are all good kids. However, as good as they are, they're kids. Sometimes they just don't listen. I can threaten, spank, ground, and it still goes in one ear and out the other. Example, my 6 yearold who was told to go to bed 30 minutes ago is now on my wife's phone with her cousin. Kids, even with good parents, are gonna be kids.
 
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