question about homosexuality

in your opinion are the gay people born that way or do they make a choice to be gay?

  • Total voters
    0
  • Poll closed .
#251
#251
therealUT said:
Has anyone here, whether heterosexual or homosexual, ever chosen to be attracted to their specific partner (not chosen to sleep with, date, etc. but actually chosen the attraction)?
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This is not the same but at a premarital counseling class the Dr teaching the class stated that love is a choice. He said if you tell yourself daily how much you love your spouse the the feeling will be there as well. If you think "what a b#####" every day, guess how you will feel.


As a man thinks in his heart so is he.

Does that apply to sexual preference? IDK
 
#252
#252
orangeslice13 said:
Behavior can be modified.
I'm tall with big feet. Wouldn't change it if I could.
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So heterosexuality is just a "behavior"? Like being rude or pleasant?

Why isn't heterosexuality more analogous to something like IQ. One is born with an innate IQ and you really can't increase it dramatically. You have to live with the cards you're dealt.
 
#253
#253
utvolpj said:
was your whole life up to the point you took your first drink spent with the same desire? For example, did you know at the age of 10 that you wanted a drink? Choosing not to drink after you've already started is different than knowing before
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In my mind the origin of the desire is not relevant. I was drinking early though. About 11yrs old.
 
#254
#254
orangeslice13 said:
In my mind the origin of the desire is not relevant. I was drinking early though. About 11yrs old.
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of course it is. You couldn't know you were attracted to alcohol without tasting it first. Same can't be said for sexuality
 
#255
#255
orangeslice13 said:
This is not the same but at a premarital counseling class the Dr teaching the class stated that love is a choice. He said if you tell yourself daily how much you love your spouse the the feeling will be there as well. If you think "what a b#####" every day, guess how you will feel.


As a man thinks in his heart so is he.

Does that apply to sexual preference? IDK
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There is quite a gap between love (defined as both a feeling and an act) and sexual attraction (in impulse). Individuals can choose how to act; they cannot choose their impulses.

Impulse (n.): Sudden or involuntary inclination or tendency to act, without premeditation or reflection.
 
#256
#256
Danl said:
So heterosexuality is just a "behavior"? Like being rude or pleasant?

Why isn't heterosexuality more analogous to something like IQ. One is born with an innate IQ and you really can't increase it dramatically. You have to live with the cards you're dealt.
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I see it as behavior but I'm not an expert.
Your point is valid and will give me something to think over.
 
#257
#257
orangeslice13 said:
This is not the same but at a premarital counseling class the Dr teaching the class stated that love is a choice. He said if you tell yourself daily how much you love your spouse the the feeling will be there as well. If you think "what a b#####" every day, guess how you will feel.


As a man thinks in his heart so is he.

Does that apply to sexual preference? IDK
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Physical attraction is different than love. Do you really believe that if you saw someone who you found physically repulsive that simply telling yourself over and over that they were beautiful would make you attracted to them?
 
#259
#259
Spartacavolus said:
its very interesting when people without children try to give lessons to those who do.

You go ahead and teach your 4 yr old son about anal sex and bj's Trut. It fits your style.
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Are you giving your 4 year old explicit details about heterosexual sex?
 
#265
#265
vader said:
Honestly, my four year old has never brought it up. That was my answer when my son asked me the question at 6.
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Why can't the response be, "You'll learn about stuff like that later son. Right now enjoy being a kid.". At the age of about 9-10 is probably about the right age, IMO, that conversations like that have a chance to stick in a kid's brain, and even then they may not remember all of it.
 
#266
#266
g8terh8ter_eric said:
Why is it a necessary conversation to have with a 4 year old anyway??
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Iirc in the original scenario wasn't it the small child who brought up the conversation. And if so I feel that's absolutely an appropriate response. It's 2012 you're not gonna be able to shield your child from homosexuality til they're 18.

Now the kid doesn't need to know what they do in the bedroom but answering "well sometimes boys like boys and girls like girls" is more appropriate then blowing the question off.
 
#267
#267
Cdywolfe said:
Iirc in the original scenario wasn't it the small child who brought up the conversation. And if so I feel that's absolutely an appropriate response. It's 2012 you're not gonna be able to shield your child from homosexuality til they're 18.

Now the kid doesn't need to know what they do in the bedroom but answering "well sometimes boys like boys and girls like girls" is more appropriate then blowing the question off.
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Who cares what year it is?? Are you going to get into a theological conversation about God as well than young?? They don't even need to know why is why and what is what, because they aren't going to be able to comprehend it. Also, you have to be VERY careful what Pandora's box you open with kids, because it can backfire if your not careful.
 
#268
#268
g8terh8ter_eric said:
Why can't the response be, "You'll learn about stuff like that later son. Right now enjoy being a kid.". At the age of about 9-10 is probably about the right age, IMO, that conversations like that have a chance to stick in a kid's brain, and even then they may not remember all of it.
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Do you want your children to stop asking questions?
 
#270
#270
g8terh8ter_eric said:
Why can't the response be, "You'll learn about stuff like that later son. Right now enjoy being a kid.". At the age of about 9-10 is probably about the right age, IMO, that conversations like that have a chance to stick in a kid's brain, and even then they may not remember all of it.
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And leave it up to his friends at school to clue him in? No thanks. I would rather my children come to me for answers.
 
#271
#271
therealUT said:
Do you want your children to stop asking questions?
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Why does it have to be an extreme?? Why can't I choose what to and what not to talk about with my kids, without being told I'm not progressive enough with my answers, at a certain age?? Some people tell their kids WAY TOO MUCH, and it backfires, and that's from experience.
 
#272
#272
vader said:
Are you giving your 4 year old explicit details about heterosexual sex?
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nope

but that has nothing to do with what was said in regards to what he will one day tell his 4 yr old. He won't hold back and will answer all questions with 100% truthfullness, is what was stated.

The fact that people on here think a 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 year old needs to know full truths about all subjects and wouldn't ask "unless they are ready to know" is absolutely laughable and a little scary because it's so ignorant.
 
#273
#273
We were watching wings last night and it was the episode where Roys gay son visits.

My boy asks, what does gay mean?


Good times
 
#274
#274
SURFSIDEBEACHVOL said:
Physical attraction is different than love. Do you really believe that if you saw someone who you found physically repulsive that simply telling yourself over and over that they were beautiful would make you attracted to them?
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Never said what I believe. I offered a thought for discussion. I do believe I can program myself to alter my behavior over an extended period of time. To what extent I'm not sure
 
#275
#275
vader said:
And leave it up to his friends at school to clue him in? No thanks. I would rather my children come to me for answers.
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Kids rarely go to their parents for answers, when they get to a certain age. You know that, as well as everyone else on this board. By the time most of us are 6, our parents are dumb as a box of rocks.
 
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